This calculator looks delicious. It’s solar powered, chocolate scented and is wrapped like chocolate. It measures 4.5″ x 2.5″. Imagine if you really could eat it and still crunch numbers. Now that would be amazing. Welcome to our latest fantastical creation: Phoenix Tears Spiced Rum – a mythical alcoholic manifestation of this ancient beast and all of its legendary powers. This pink grapefruit-flavoured gin is made from the glittery tears of fabulous flamingos. It's a bold hit of bittersweet citrus blended with crisp and dry juniper aromas to create one seriously tasty gin. Just give it a swirl to whip up a shimmery coral-coloured haze. Like its fabled stablemate Unicorn Tears Gin, our closely-guarded extraction methods will remain a mystery for now. Just know that we've the mixed their tears into a premium Caribbean Rum carrying aromas of brown sugar and dried fruit blended with natural cinnamon and ginger to give it a sweet and spicy flavour. It's the missing mythical ingredient in your liquor cabinet.

Take two of life's greatest pleasures – casually sipping a tumbler's worth of delicious booze and enjoying a damn fine cup of Joe – then combine them into one glorious hot drink and you've got our Spirited Coffee.All you need to know is, we've tried it and it really is outrageously hot. We wouldn't have given it our Instant Regret seal of "approval" otherwise. This stuff is so hot that it even goes beyond the realm of food jokes, even cruel jokes intended for people you don’t like. Basically, don’t eat this stuff unless you’re a real glutton for punishment or just suddenly wake up one day and decide you want to remove your tongue. These unusual boozy infusions are made using hand-roasted Colombian Arabica beans and come in two equally indulgent flavours: GeekAlerts has shown you some spicy foods in the past, but the World’s Hottest Chocolate Bar might be at the top of the list. Based on what the video below shows, you’ll probably be crying after eating a piece smaller than your fingernail. Not just sugar, spice, and everything nice. This dark rum-infused coffee perfectly captures the real essence of the Caribbean spirit; with warm notes of toasted sugar, spiced caramel and a hint of smoked, dark chocolate.

The World’s Hottest Chocolate Bar weighs four grams and contains 35 calories. The small piece of milk chocolate is mixed with a special chili extract that has a Scoville rating of nine million. For comparison’s sake, the current world record for hottest chili pepper is “merely” rated at 2.2 million. CAUTION: Chocolate contains extreme quantities of chilli and is not suitable for children, pets or the elderly. Drink cold as an indulgent iced-coffee in summer or pour over vanilla ice cream for an out-of-this-world affogato. For our second batch, we’ve refined and improved our emotion harvesting technology, resulting in a bittersweet gin experience and an iridescent glittery appearance that will blow your mind.Unicorn Tears Gin Liqueur This gin liqueur contains real Unicorn tears. Created by Firebox in a secret location, using our free range Unicorn herd and closely-guarded extraction process (patent pending). This Chocolate Bar Calculator looks like a chocolate bar that looks like a calculator, but it’s the other way around. It is all number crunching and no calories. In other words, don’t eat it. You’ll break a tooth. CAUTION: This bar has been made in a factory that regularly uses tree nuts and peanuts, although that’ll be the least of your worries once you try some.