Seperti judulnya, buku ini membahas mengenai realita dan 'kesalahan' apa saja yang diperbuat manusia mengenai pemikiran mereka tentang pernikahan. Beberapa kesimpulan yang bisa kujabarkan sedikit mungkin ini: We need to learn how to communicate in a peaceful space where both sides can communicate their feelings and needs without blame or guilt. 8) You’ll learn to make a balance When we fall in love and choose our spouse, it’s amazing how that special man or woman suddenly has the ability to bring all of our flaws to the surface. You know, the imperfections we work so hard to protect and keep hidden. It’s uncanny how we can work diligently to present only the best of who we are when we are dating, and then suddenly that special someone in our world can begin to expose the issues we’ve brought with us from childhood — and the selfish ways we tend to interact in relationships. Daily interactions have a way of revealing the weaknesses we never displayed prior to saying “I do.”

Romatic Marriage, який прийшов на зміну меркантильному погляду, для якого достатньо лише відчувати прекрасні емоції та любов. If you’re in a relationship that only makes you feel unhappy and depressed, then this is the time to set yourself free and learn who it is that you really are and what it is that makes you happy.There is no doubt that we are always searching for a certain quality in our future partner, and often this quality comes with a price. We marry wrongly because don’t — whatever we may say — ultimately associate being loved with feeling satisfied. When sex was only available within marriage, people recognised that this led people to marry for the wrong reasons: to obtain something that was artificially restricted in society as a whole. People are free to make much better choices about who they marry now they’re not simply responding to a desperate desire for sex. Marriage of Psychology. Одним з перших питань до партнера на етапі ранніх стосунків має стати: "And how are you mad?" Orang-orang seperti poin 1 (bisa jadi kita, pasangan kita, atau keduanya) kemudian bertemu dan menjalani hubungan cinta.

Of course, this can be hard if you have been through some tough situations with someone who made vows they didn’t keep. We need to know the intimate functioning of the psyche of the person we’re planning to marry. We need to know their attitudes to, and stance on, authority, humiliation, introspection, sexual intimacy, money, children, ageing, fidelity and a hundred things besides. This knowledge won’t be available via a standard chat. We need a level of insight currently generally only available to psychological professionals at the PhD level. If you’re with someone who has never loved you for you, then this is the time to try to find someone who does.So there’s a pretty hefty majority. But I’m here to give counsel and to give consolation for this situation. You know, there’s a lot of anger around our love lives privately held. But a lot of us go around feeling quite enraged, angry privately, about the way that our love lives have gone. How do such errors happen, in our enlightened, knowledge-rich times? We can say straight off that they occur with appalling ease and regularity. Academic achievement and career success seem to provide no vaccines. Otherwise intelligent people daily and blithely make the move. While for some people it might be easier to internalize the 'content' in a written form, I thing that the lecture itself contains the "core" of the topic and the book is just a nice addition. This one was really cute - sent it around to my fellow psychological professionals for a good laugh, but I generally do agree with the sentiment) One of the greatest privileges of being on one’s own is the flattering illusion that one is, in truth, really quite an easy person to live with.

Getting married has no power to keep a relationship at this beautiful stage. It is not in command of the ingredients of our happiness at that point. In fact, marriage will decisively move the relationship on to another, very different moment: to a suburban house, a long commute, two small children. The only ingredient in common is the partner. And that might have been the wrong ingredient to bottle. And yet today, years later, each and every moment spent with him is pure bliss. I have never felt so truly seen and adored for who I am. Our days are filled with surprising playfulness. Though we were on vastly different trajectories in life when we met, we somehow seemed to have co-created a perfectly aligned reality today. Understand the ups and downs of the past relationships, because it is important to know what it is you’re getting yourself into. Anyone we might marry could, of course, be a little bit wrong for us. We don’t expect bliss every day. We know that perfection is not on the cards. Nevertheless, there are couples who display such deep-seated incompatibility, such heightened rage and disappointment, that we have to conclude that something else is at play beyond the normal scratchiness: they appear to have married the wrong person.This has been the second book from "The School of Life" I'd read (The Great Thinkers being the other). I must say that I very much like the accessibility and style with which their books, including this one, are put together. It’s common for all of us to wish that our partners would act a certain way or stop doing certain things — but we always have the choice to change ourselves. When are we ready for marriage? 1.) When we are ready to give up perfection 2.) When we despair of being understood 3.) When we realize we are crazy (If we are not regularly and very deeply embarrassed by who we are, it an be only be because we haven't begun to understand our own narrative". 4.) We are ready to love rather than be loved 5.) When we are ready for administration (I accept the dignity of the ironing board) 6.) When we understand that sex and love do and don't belong together 7.) When we are happy to be taught and calm about teaching 8.) When we realize that we are not that compatible (compatibility is an achievement of love, it shouldn't be its precondition) In almost every culture, getting married is a sign of social achievement. Never mind that your spouse might be abusive, or that you might go through a nasty divorce lose all your assets, or that your children might grow up in a broken home. At least, someone wanted to marry you in the first place.