Could a straight guy get drunk enough to fool around with another guy just because it “felt good”, or is it more likely that he has some gay/bi/curious feelings that perhaps he’s been repressing? When this happened to me, I pretended not to remember anything because I knew the situation would be uncomfortable for my straight friend. In other words, I was trying to give him an escape route by pretending that I didn’t remember anything about that night (plausible deniability, if you will). If he thought that I didn’t remember anything about that night, then he could say the same thing and never have to mention it again.

Frog Meadow was our 1st stop of a New England road trip. The breakfast at the B&B was outstanding and if you go in the fall you get a treat to have their homemade cider - YUM! I remember thinking it was kind of messed up but went along with it. He said it was my turn Reciprocal Ideally, he's going to get over his awkwardness, which in turn will help you get over yours, and things will eventually - in time - return to normal. Both of you will pretend that it never happened, and that will be that.At any rate, a few weeks ago, on a Friday night – Mike busted out some 420. This wasn’t a surprise because in the past, we’ve shared a smoke together. I know that this might sound harsh, maybe even too harsh. But really, I know exactly what you're feeling. I don't know many gay men (myself included) who hasn't developed a crush or had feelings for a straight guy - including straight friends. It happens all too frequently, but there is just one important thing to remember...

Hearing those stories, imagining this poor young woman staring at me, giggling and pointing, trying to navigate around it, all I felt was incredible embarrassment. No massages for me, I decided. No way. Turn off your phone. Nobody wants their phone to be dinging during what’s supposed to be a relaxing 30-90 minutes. Even a vibration is often noticeable in a quiet room, so go nuclear, and shut the dang thing down. Probably needs a break anyway after being on for a few months straight. Communicate. Something uncomfortable? Let the massage therapist know. They’ll usually ask at the beginning what kind of pressure you want; if you don’t know, tell them that, then be sure to communicate whether you like what they’re doing or not. In this type of setting, it’s not at all personal. Do you think she will understand that this was just a physical act that occurred in your intoxicated state and in no way reflects on your sexual preference? I’ve told you that I don’t think this makes you gay or even bi, but it’s not like you can just print off this post and show it to your girlfriend as proof. I think that most straight people have a problem understanding situations like this because they identify so strongly with being straight. So until they find themselves in a similar situation, they don’t see how it can be possible for a straight person to have a sexual experience with a person of the same sex and not be gay or at least bisexual. This is why you’re having such a hard time dealing with the whole experience, and it’s very likely that your girlfriend would have a problem with it for the same reasons. I hope that you are able to come to terms with this situation, realize why it happened, and realize that it doesn’t change anything about you or your orientation. I think it would be much harder for your girlfriend to come to terms with the situation because she’s not the one it happened to. We ended up talking on the phone again about a week later when I asked if some friends could come over and watch football. During this conversation Jeff brought up the sexual encounter again and stressed how important it was that his girlfriend not find out about it. I told him that I had no intention of telling his girlfriend.

If he gets angry or wonders why you lied about not remembering anything, just tell the truth. Tell him you were hoping he didn't remember, and that you didn't want to say anything because you were trying to avoid awkwardness. Tell him that you were hoping that you both could have put it behind you without talking about it, since you were both crazy drunk and didn't even know what you were doing. Now we’re going to look at the types of people you are likely to encounter in the gay saunas of the world. Scott and Dave really made us feel at home and were helpful in letting us know about things we could do nearby, meal options as well as walks we could take on their property. So what I am saying is, don't be surprised if this does not go well for you. Also, my 'straight' friend was single. Yours is not. You have to consider that you just enabled him to cheat on his girlfriend. Not a good situation to put yourself in.

I probably wouldn’t mention this to your girlfriend. Others will disagree with me on this advice, but I just don’t see how telling her can make the situation any better; it can certainly make the situation worse. She likely will not understand how or why this could’ve happened (just like you are unable to understand how or why it happened). She will have more questions than you’ll have answers for, and your answers may not be to her satisfaction. I really think it’s best to not bring this up to her. I think cheating is wrong. I also believe that people make mistakes and can learn from those mistakes. It seems probable that your girlfriend will not find out about this incident unless you specifically tell her. Assuming that you've learned your lesson and are genuinely contrite, I stand by my earlier statement that I don't how telling your girlfriend can make the situation any better.Dave, in addition to being a talented chef, also gives what is possibly one of the best massages on the face of the planet!

They are straight. They are not interested in a romantic relationship with you; if they were they'd come out as bisexual or gay. They have not, therefore there is no hope for a relationship with them. You're only setting yourself up for failure, heartbreak, and the loss of a friend. You do not want his girlfriend finding out. Why? Well, just imagine how you'd feel if your boyfriend wanted to hang out with a guy he cheated on you with. Unless she's a super kinky freak and finds it incredibly hot and either wants to watch her boyfriend and you together, or wants to have a threesome, she's not going to want him anywhere near you. The big spike of the past decade probably had a lot to do with toy makers’ outreach and education efforts. Aneros reps travel the world, says Andrews, “giving training sessions on the ins and outs of prostate play, while familiarizing sales staff with our prostate stimulators.” LELO (opens in a new tab) has likewise published and promoted a series of how-to guides and normalization and demystification articles and ads, especially since 2015 (opens in a new tab), when they decided to double down on the prostate toy market. Since it was the first time you've both seen each other since it happened, it was inevitable that it'd be awkward. It's like a bond of trust that's been broken and needs to be rebuilt. He's afraid that if he drinks around you that it's going to happen again. I had a similar experience with a 'straight' friend many years ago. We had a few drinks, I slept over his place, and then during the night while we were passed out together he started touching my face and laughing. At first I thought he was just being a goof, but then I moved a little closer. Before I knew it we were making out and it went from there.A few years later, in Chicago for a design-industry conference, I saw that the fitness center in my hotel offered massage services. I could charge one to my bill and add it to my expense account. Great. I called for an appointment. The only time that worked was 6 a.m., two mornings later. “Too damn early,” I said, then reconsidered. “I’ll take it.” My main concern with this ordeal is not wanting to jeopardize a friendship. I'm uncomfortable about this whole situation mainly because he is uncomfortable. It doesn't bother me that I fooled around with another guy (other than the fact I enabled him to cheat); I'm gay after all. On the other hand, he is a straight guy in a serious relationship. I know that he probably remembers at least something, and is probably very bothered by it. And that is what's ultimately bothering me. I want so badly to let him know that it was a mistake and that it won't happen again. I want to let him know that I won't ever bring up the situation again. I want to let him know that our friendship means much more to me than some stupid, drunken mistake. I want to let him know that he has nothing to worry about. BUT, I can't. I still think the best thing to do, as many of you have suggested, is to keep my mouth shut unless he brings it up. Even then, I'll probably feign ignorance and write it off to being drunk. I’m definitely attracted to this guy, and I guess hooking up with him was always a fantasy of mine. But I tried to keep that fantasy out of my mind as much as possible because I valued his friendship so much. I wanted to see him as a good friend, not as the object of some fantasy. I thought that would only cause problems with the friendship, regardless of whether he knew about the fantasy or not. I agree that the best thing to do is to put the whole thing out of my mind and pretend it never happened. The only way I think he would ever bring it up would be to guage my response to determine if I remembered anything.