Why do they seem to crave a situation that feels like their wives are imposing it on them unilaterally whether they like it or not? Then I spanked you with my sandal until you showed genuine remorse. I might have felt sorry for you and even saved your correction until after our guests were gone, if I had not warned you repeatedly of the consequences of sassing me in public. So, what happened next?” Alice has to present as a girl in the home. I know many FLRs and femdom relationships don’t use feminisation but this is discipline rule number one for me. I expect her in female ‘wear’ at all times at home, female underwear outside and to have a female beauty regime. There was no need for corner time, so I told him what I wanted of him next. “I left a pair of panties out on our bed. Change out of your boxers and put those on.” Males think their little willies are so important and masculine so it’s necessary to have this discipline to demonstrate that it’s insignificant. It’s the final element to ensure removal of nasty masculine traits once you’ve feminised him. I renamed it a clitty a long time ago and the whole area is her pussy. I ask Alice to tell me who owns it and tell me how feminine it is, especially with a cure little triangle of pubic hair. ”

In fact, many if not most of us say that we want her to have the sole discretion to determine whether a disciplinary spanking has been earned. The couple may have agreements or understandings around the kind of behavior that is presumed to be punishable, but she gets to decide when the agreed-upon rules or standards have been transgressed and whether to do something about it. I use hand, crop or wooden spatula. Besides being a necessary discipline I do so enjoy it. There’s something about the feeling of power when spanking a naughty girly husband. 4 Clitty control and feminisation I held the door for Susan, reeling from the bomb she’d dropped on me, sending what I thought was our happy life together up in smoke. Discipline and punishment is a difficult area in a loving relationship but it’s necessary in an FLR to enforce the transfer of power to the lady of the house. That would be me. Spankings of every level of severity have psychological benefit for training your man, regardless of his ability to maintain his emotional composure. It is also true that you will never make more valuable progress in training through spanking than every time you push him beyond his threshold for tears. Not every spanking needs to be about whether he cries or not, and certainly your interest in reaching tears may vary greatly from one type of spanking to another. Some women believe spanking to tears is too much, while others believe that reaching tears is a sign the spanking has worked and should end. Still others believe that spanking is just warm up until tears are reached, and only then does the actual teaching spanking begin. No matter how serious you are about spanking, remember to break your man in over time, and not to go from zero to sixty right away.First, most of them affirmatively asked for this kind of relationship, so the lifestyle itself plainly is consensual. Some of our rules include such things as the area of decision making. Once Kathy has asked Gary for his input, and genuinely considers his position she will make a decision that she feels is best for our marriage and family. Once she has made her decision, Gary is expected to not only accept her decision, but to really “embrace” the decision. Once she makes a decision she does not allow complaining, whining or rehashing it. If he violates that rule he is generally harshly spanked with a paddle or cane. another of our rules is that if Gary ever curses at Kathy, speaks disrespectfully to her, walks away in a huff, etc., Kathy generally would wash his mouth out with soap and then rather severely spank him. A third rule is related to finances. Kathy is much better at financial management than Gary. She gives him a small allowance each week, and if he runs out of money he is to come to her and ask for additional funds. If he ever buys something outside of his allowance by using a credit or debit card without first getting her prior approval, he is generally spanked quite severely. Another rule is in the area of housework. Gary is responsible for most of the household chores, including laundry, dusting, vacuuming, washing the floors, etc. If he does not complete his chores on time or in the manner Kathy expects she will typically ask him for an explanation and then dole out punishment if necessary. All of our rules were developed together and we both agreed on the consequences if the rule is broken. When we communicate dramatically and emotionally to ourselves, we make the problem even more intractable.

And, because accountability is often a big part of the drive for men who want this, deep down inside they hope she will be fairly rigorous in her application of the rules. I’m not being facetious. I can think of a dozen times that I’ve been convinced of the righteousness of my own position, right up until the moment when she puts me over her knee and explains her view, again, in short, emphatic sentences and rhetorical questions, punctuated by paddle swats. It is hard to say for sure how common a FLR might be, but since we began to explore it several years ago, there is certainly a lot more information available on the subject today information on FLR is enormous compared to what was available just a few years ago. We sense that it is becoming more and more common, and is rapidly growing in popularity. Though this component of your new relationship with your husband may be more difficult to embrace than the first, don’t tune out yet. Punishment is essential to projecting power and you’ll be amazed at the effect it has on your marriage.The blog section will be added to most often. This will cover some of the topics above but also provide accounts of actual spankings that my husband has received from me. Some blogs are written by me and some are written by my husband. This should provide a good perspective from both a top (spanker) and bottom (spankee). She leads by example. She is a much nicer, kinder person than I am and provides consequences to me when I am not as nice or kind. I don’t mind this at all as it actually cultivates me into a better person. Some problems are simply too big to be resolved with a spanking or other form of adult discipline.” Take care of yourself, John, and get those papers signed. The terms are not negotiable. If you take me to court, I’ll take everything you’ve got. You can’t afford a lawyer, and Harry hired the best. Good bye, John.”

I did. But did I first take down your pants and your boxers in front of Evie, Marge, and their husbands?” In addition to the difficulty in physically resisting a stronger male, let’s add in the element of a god figure who supposedly has dictated the whole unequal power dynamic. How consensual can any such arrangement be if one or both parties think it has been dictated by a punitive supernatural power? Female-led disciplinary relationships ARE consensual The thing to remember is that most wives attempt to punish their husbands somewhat regularly but in less effective, indirect and passive/aggresive ways. Those ways do not usually work well because the husband usually doesn’t understand what is happening and if he does, he resents being manipulated in such weak and cowardly ways. Men respect strength. The woman who punishes her husband in a forthright manner wins his respect and adoration. A woman who attempts to punish her husband in weak and indirect ways earns his disregard and even contempt. No matter the duration, intensity, or reason, your man had better appreciate that you care enough to spank him. Never let him forget to thank you for your efforts on his behalf. He should be very grateful you care enough about the strength of your relationship to spank him, and for all the attention and help you are giving him to help him in self-improvement, discipline, and endurance. I know some would object to that kind of top-down decision-making on such an important issue. But in the absence of an agreed-upon hierarchy, what is the alternative? Just defaulting to the status quo?Both wives are considering ways to introduce domestic discipline into their own marriages. Since they are two intelligent, strong-willed women, I’m betting Sam and Bill—both average adult males—have little chance of maintaining their un-spanked status quo through the summer.

Our inability to agree became a major stressor. I honestly believe it might have been better, both for the relationship and for the project, had the client simply anointed one of us “Leader.” So, why do so many husbands who have asked for these relationships want it to feel as if they didn’t?There are many ways to be in an “Female Led Relationship” and we’ve evolved into something that works very well for us. For some, FLR indicates that the woman calls ALL the shots and makes ALL the decisions regarding the household, finances and events. The man’s position in this situation is that he does exactly as instructed by his wife or girlfriend. Not what we do but as long as its consensual, safe and sane…more power to you. Note that she didn’t ask me whether I agreed with her decision that a spanking was coming. Rather, she asked me whether I agreed with the underlying facts. After that, the decision on how to proceed was all hers. The plain fact is, many men in these relationships want it to feel like discipline is imposed, i.e., that it’s going to happen whether they like it or not. Think of it as one more reminder. You say that being spanked and sent to bed last time was the most humiliating evening of your life. Imagine if I have to take down your pants and spank you again tonight, and our friends see that you’re wearing panties. How humiliating will that be?” After she took control, the underlying problem that caused the resentment didn’t go away, but the internal emotional tenor of it suddenly seemed much less serious and the entire thing seemed more manageable.