I’ve also watched my Aunt sadly pass away from breast cancer, and this past year I’ve seen my own mum battle with the horrid disease and come out the other side. The question is, how do you think you get your super weapon to work? How do you make her more powerful? By totally getting it on with her, that’s how.

This stand out feature alone warrants caution. The game itself? Well, it’s a surprisingly ‘deep’ 3D anime girl model editor. You can change almost any and every aspect you’d like, to create your perfect girl – before talking to her, manipulating her, watching her dance for you I’m sure you get the picture. Does he have a point? Why do we latch on to one asset and feel the need to draw everyone’s attention to it? Think of it as a virtual lap-dance from an 3D anime model, where you can basically alter the setting as you please. This level of customisation even extends to the… er… more ‘intimate’ aspects of the game, which I will leave to either your imagination, or your ability to successfully navigate YouTube’s search function. Cards that you collect can be powered up in a rather unique way. Unlike games like Valkyrie Crusade, where you evolve or amalgamate cards of like-types. Monster Monpiece asks that you open up a full view of the card you want to power up and then poke and prod at the sexy artwork in the right places to build meter. Once you’ve got them to the appropriate level it’s time to frantically stroke your card to bring them to… er… fruition. Be successful in this rather ridiculous process and your cards will be 1) Even more awesome and 2) even more saucy.

Gameplay

If you scroll further down this list you’ll find the original Gal*Gun, but since I originally wrote this, two further Gal*Gun games have been released – Double Peace and more recently Gal*Gun 2. These stay firmly in the rail-shooting-against-hordes-of-giddy-girls-vying-for-your-attention genre.

Originally on 360 and PS3 – Atlus’ Catherine has had a much awaited re-release and remaster. One the one side you have a game which is very much narrative driven . As the lead character Vincent, you have to choose between Katherine with a K – who’s basically all about marriage and settling down and responsibility – and on the other hand you have Catherine, the attractive seductive blonde. The good thing about Hunie Pop is, well, it’s actually quite a decent game. Beware though, there are two version of this game, a marginally lewd version on Steam and then a REALLY LEWD version that you can buy from placed like mangagamer.com Structurally this is a top down RPG – where you must get the girls to climb a tower and defeat the enemies within. They’re not the most obedient lot and so it’s your task, as warden, to whip them into shape – sometimes being gentle, sometimes being firm. The battle are unique in that you don’t have direct control over your girls – instead you’re provided with just a handful of options – with more exposing themselves between battles when you take them to the Punishment Chamber to have their skill set levelled up.Inspired by (or directly containing elements of) storytelling and visual design that are otherwise most commonly seen in Japanese animation. To begin with you have to court her – there’s a choice of three girls you can go for – and there’s a fairly rpg-like feel to the experience. You can build stats, go on dates and see if you can walk her home. Once you’re with the girl of your choice (triggered by a mutual confession of your interest in each other) the game changes up – and gets even more involving. Unlike Visual Novels – there’s no titillating CG reward.

You’re a guy in school. Who accidentally gets hit by all of Cupids arrows (bear with me) the affect of which is that every single girl in school totally wants a piece of him. You take that first step and you’re greeted by beautiful friends who compliment you on your outfit, laugh with you about something that happened recently and introduce you to someone in the group you haven’t met before.Games that try to simulate real-world activities (like driving vehicles or living the life of someone else) with as much realism as possible. Simulators generally require more study and orientation than arcade games, and the best simulators are also educational. This is a no brainer. It’s basically a match 3 puzzle dating sim – where you have to woo the ladies by stalking them around town, buying them gifts and chatting them up in bars. While Double Peace if perhaps seen as the favourite among fans, Gal*Gun 2 is particularly interesting as it ups the visual ante somewhat, is available on Switch and, crucially is also one of the few sexy games playable in VR if you’re so inclined.

Elsewhere, big breasts can make dressing for an event hard. If you wear something loose to avoid highlighting your boobs, the fabric tends to hang off them and make you seem larger. If you wear tight fabric around your boobs, you look more cinched in the waist and it forms a more flattering silhouette. I have a pretty high tolerance for terrible games but I make an exception for this one – I’m not going to beat around the bush, this is absolute garbage. You take yourself off to the bathroom and take a long hard look in the mirror. Do I look like a slut? Am I trying too hard to get attention? You start questioning yourself over something that will later feel so trivial, but for tonight, sits on your shoulders like a terrible weight.

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As RPG’s go it’s actually not that great – meandering dialogue that doesn’t really go anywhere and, though conceptually, the design is pretty great, it’s all disappointingly menu-driven. You’ve spent time on your hair and makeup, and the spritz of expensive perfume may have hurt when you initially handed over the credit card, but the scent has set a mood for you. I studied hard and earnt a place at university. I strived to gain my dream job and I’ve saved to travel to the most amazing places around the world. I’m not my boobs, they’re just something I like. You’re not doing this for anyone but yourself. You want to look how you feel. Like a woman in charge. Sexy. Capable. Aware of her assets and not afraid to show them off — physical or otherwise. You're a big tiddie cowgirl in some seedy bar. There's only one thing to do. Bounce various milk containers on your boobs