I sort of noticed that too- there are no constructive responses, but maybe that’s not really the intent of this. Anyway, I don’t think you can really treat a 50 year old any different than a 40 or 30 year old. It’s just that you have been going through this 10 or 20 or 30 years longer so you may be more resolute to make a change (or more engrained in your patterns 🙁 I live in a community where there are a lot of homeless people, and I always think to myself that those individuals are someone’s child, and what heartbreak their parents must be experiencing, and I wonder what their story is. I also think it took great courage and self care and somewhat like putting your air mask on your face first on the airplane for those parents to have let go. Doing Life with Your Adult Children helps you navigate this rich and challenging season of parenting. Speaking from his own personal and professional experience, Burns offers practical answers to the most common questions he's received over the years, including: As Byford reminds me, women’s friendships are on the whole very much based on disclosing things to each other. “But there seems to be a taboo about talking about things that are difficult at this stage, as if it’s your fault. You’d rather give a positive version of your family life. It took a while for these women to say, ‘You know what? This is really difficult.’ And it is difficult for all of us.

They may be struggling with the clichéd negative attitudes towards post-menopausal women; they may be leaving work without wanting to retire; they may not have anticipated the next phase of their lives being different, so any sense of rejection by their children may feel particularly hurtful. With the help of my parents, financialy and emotionaly my children finished thier college and 2016 my father died. I like A. W. Tozer's analogy of truth being like a bird with two wings, that we should balance scripture with scripture because a one-winged bird doesn't fly very well.

I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." - Maya Anglou

Speak words of grace. Leave loving messages without advice. Text positive statements. Cheer them on. Reflect grace of God. I love my adult daughter very much! We were close until she turned 23. We did everything together and we showed love and respect for each other. The goal of the important phone call is to schedule an in person conversation – You know how much your father and I love you. Something important to us had come up and I need to discuss it with you – how about lunch next Thursday? I thought there were some good tips to help if your adult child is "failing to launch", and the chapter about entitlement and enabling was also particularly good (how could I get away with handing this book to a certain few people, I wonder. . .NO! Mind your own business, Shonya!) There were also some excellent tips for adding in-laws to the family and being being both fun and God-honoring in the grandparentinWhatever parenting adult children concerns arise in this new phase, the challenge often boils down to setting and honoring boundaries: Adjusting from being involved in all aspects of their lives to respecting their autonomy as young adults has been interesting. I've definitely made some blunders along the way and expect that, even with the best of intentions, I'll likely make more in the future. It's hard letting go. It's hard keeping opinions and unsolicited advice to myself. Sometimes I step on toes and hurt feelings, which is not what I want to do. Not at all! So, when I stumbled across this book with its catchy little title, I figured I'd give it a listen. Your post was helpful and made me feel a little more normal in my feelings and situation. My oldest is 41, unmarried and had two sons she’s 19 and 10. Last year she got an apartment with a man she met on the internet. He lived in another state and after meeting him just twice he moved here and they moved in together. I begged her just to date him until they knew each other better but she wouldn’t listen. I told her if she and the boys left my home this time she could not return and she agreed. A few months ago he left and they had both just signed a new lease. She can’t afford the rent and is begging to come home. This will be the 7th time she had done this and I feel like my house has a revolving door. My husband died 7 years ago and our 38 year old son with Muscular Dystrophy lives with me. I feel torn and beaten down as she says hurtful things now that I’m not bending. I also worry about my grandsons. I’m at my wits end. I want her to learn to be independent. I don’t want to enable her. What to do? Jim Burns, Ph.D., President of HomeWord is the host of the HomeWord with Jim Burns daily half-hour, daily one-minute, and weekly half-hour radio programs. His passion is communicating to adults and young people practical truths to help them live out their Christian lives. Failing to recognize this comes into play in preparing a child for society, but also, failing to recognize this may place more blame on the parents of a wandering child than is warranted. As the old saying goes, God is the perfect Parent, but look at how His children turned out!

There were a couple of points I didn't completely agree with. For example, he had some different counsel/reaction than I think I would regarding "children not embracing my values" and I didn't agree with his attitude toward the culture and its effect on our children. He seems to think it's expected that culture will influence our children more than we can and we just have to accept it. I don't think it has to be that way, nor do I think it is good to just passively give in.Genre: Parenting, Nonfiction Christian, Christian Living, Family Relationships, Self Help, How To, Christianity, One reviewer called this book a Dr. Phil-like book. Some complained that there was so much scripture; others that there was hardly any. I would've said that there was a scant amount, but that it was there. I'm guessing maybe 6 passages for the entire 9 chapters. I could be wrong. There could have been more. But it wasn't expository in that it wasn't pulling out the meaning of the passages and then applying them. They were just part of the thought-flow. This is just one of many stories………I have a beautiful son. He just turned thirty..so nice young man. He is finishing school to be an electrical engineer. He just started with a fortune five hundred company as an enturn. I feel she drains me and always has to the point I can’t spend time with him. I am exausted.