Find Your People: Building Deep Community in a Lonely World

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Find Your People: Building Deep Community in a Lonely World

Find Your People: Building Deep Community in a Lonely World

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Nowadays, the situation is even worse. Thanks to social media, virtual connection takes precedence over real-life connection. All the facets of our lives have become separate, with work, home, and spirituality having little to do with one another. Sometimes you genuinely need to recharge and reschedule, which I fully encourage, but other times I need to remind myself to actually keep plans and take a chance that this might be exactly what I needed, even if solitude seems safer. And then I come home feeling so happy that I took the risk and left my cocoon for a bit. My earliest memories from childhood are watching, in awe, the depictions of tight-knit friend groups in TV and movies. I’d watch them excitedly on-screen, as though it was a fortune teller showing me a glimpse into my future great-friend-having life. I always assumed that even if I didn’t have the friendships that I saw on TV at that very moment, once I became an adult, they would surely materialize. And maybe you did too. The Internet is a great place to start looking for your community, but it’s simply one way to find your people. Or you may like to make it more visual with a mind-map style diagram of all the important elements that make up the person behind the name and face.

Find Your People (The Ones Who Really Get You) 5 Ways to Find Your People (The Ones Who Really Get You)

What would you say is the number one reason you don’t have friends? The main explanation Allen hears people give is that they’re too busy. Instead of setting up a regular time to meet with friends, people squeeze in a lunch date here and there. Or they attend a monthly club where the conversation never really goes beyond the surface. The other weak point was on finding people that have time. Allen makes it sound easy to find people who will make time for you. No, she didn’t say that everyone you ask will, but she makes it sound easy. I personally know from experience that just finding people willing to make time can be one of the biggest challenges. I don’t think someone who is popular can understand this challenge well.My dear friend Jennie Allen shows us how to make true emotional connections with the right people so that our authentic relationships can be healthy for all."--Lysa TerKeurst, author of It's Not Supposed to Be This Way

Find Your People: How to Finally Make the You Will Find Your People: How to Finally Make the

What I loved most about this book? Allen’s willingness to share her own mistakes. She was careful with other people’s hearts while still sharing how much she has messed up and ways she has hurt others. I think her transparency and humility to share her failures made this book even more powerful. I respect Jennie Allen, but this book bothered my conscience at times. There was a large amount of biblical truth in this book, and her practical tools were helpful, but at times I felt like Jennie Allen was out of touch with her audience and, to be frank, insensitive and prideful. I had a few big issues with this book:And whilst some steps are arguably more important than others, they all deserve at least some time and attention. 1. Identify Your Personality Type Sure, I had friends and close family, and ended up successful in my career, but there was a kind of connection I was missing. Something where my particular gifts were treasured, and my particular sort of oddness was accepted and cherished; and where I felt safe enough to cherish and embrace the odd gifts of those around me. Steve Phillips-Waller is the founder and editor of A Conscious Rethink. He has written extensively on the topics of life, relationships, and mental health for more than 8 years. You are merely uncovering the true nature of your unique self and even if it’s not what you expected, it’s still you. In a world that’s both more connected and more isolating than ever before, we’re often tempted to do life alone, whether because we’re so busy or because relationships feel risky and hard. But science confirms that consistent, meaningful connection with others has a powerful impact on ourwell-being. We are meant to live known and loved. But so many are hiding behind emotional walls that we’re experiencing an epidemic of loneliness.

Find Your People Summary of Key Ideas and Review - Blinkist Find Your People Summary of Key Ideas and Review - Blinkist

For a book that is supposed to be about making deep connections, I think the information and examples provided were very shallow. I came out of the book with the same amount of knowledge I had going into the book so...nothing profoundly helpful or groundbreaking here. The reality is that this “busyness” is an illusion. Allen explains that you don’t necessarily need to spend a ton of time going out and trying to make friends –⁠ God has put lots of people into your path already. All you have to do is invite them into your life! You should feel comfortable with the person that you are and the ways you think and act and treat others.Community type #5: purpose. Purposeful communities are those that share a vision of the world. They don’t always have user groups and are often not geography dependent. Finding people with a common purpose means finding those who share a concrete commitment to a specific cause, and this involves a more sophisticated method of signaling and seeking. For example, Rachel Sklar and Glynnis MacNicol built a tribe of 500 women in tech, which coalesced into an organization called TheLi.st, with whom they share their deepest purpose: to change the ratio of women on conference stages, in investments and as CEOs. You know the ones—the people who get you, somehow; who are on the same wavelength. Some might even say the people who share the same brand of quirky, crazy, or oddness that you do. The ones who understand why you do what you do, or if they don’t understand, they either ask or they just accept, and either way is fine. Key takeaways -- It takes a lot of time to develop deep friendships so invest in trying to build up many hours of time with people. Be vulnerable and honest. Have tough, unpleasant conversations. Most important to Allen is that you seek out friendships where you spend a lot of time so you see those people all the time. She says it doesn't matter if you're not close in age or share a lot of things in common but you need to have relationships where you can be in each other's lives and do things like drop by unannounced. She also advocates telling your friends everything and asking things of them. Here’s that link again if you’d like to learn more about the service BetterHelp.com provide and the process of getting started. Meanwhile, you probably spend a significant amount of time wishing you had the kinds of friendships you see on your favorite TV shows –⁠ Friends, Cheers, and so on. The kind of connection where you feel comfortable randomly dropping by your friend’s place with a pizza and plates. The bond that stays strong even when you hurt each other, where you work out your issues instead of bailing.

find where you Feel like you don’t fit in? Here’s how to find where you

It is this type of community that Jennie is trying to reconstruct with this book. The type that feels comfortable relying on one another, even for the hard things. The type that can be vulnerable and real with each other, knowing that they will be loved despite their flaws. The type that will laugh and cry and run errands together. And the best part is that she launches this quest for community by being real and vulnerable with us as readers.I love the idea of having a small group of friends that you get together with and be really involved with. I love the idea of weekly get togethers. I loved the biblical preaching of man is not made to be alone and how it goes into details about that. I love the sense of community. I love sharing the really ugly and the good and getting real about life. So yes, there is a lot of good to this book.



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