Humans possess the natural ability to empathize and connect with others. Unfortunately, we get blinded by self-absorption. Our sense of self-worth is tied to the attention we receive and the quality of our interactions. The problem arises when we rely on others’ attention and validation to feel worthy and alive. Most of us have depressive tendencies and moments. The best way to handle them is to be aware of their necessity—they are our body’s and mind’s way of compelling us to slow down, to lower our energies and withdraw." The Law of Defensiveness. This is my favourite chapter in the book. This chapter revolves around assessing people's self-opinion. People go through life with an opinion of themselves and their abilities. When this opinion is challenged in any way, people get defensive. Robert lays out 3 universal aspects that apply to almost everyone's self-opinion. He then gives advice on how to influence others by working with their self-opinion. "If you wish to win a man's heart, allow him to confute you" - Benjamin Disraeli. The first step toward becoming rational is to understand our fundamental irrationality. The most common emotion is the desire for pleasure and the avoidance of pain. Our thoughts almost inevitably revolve around this desire; we simply recoil from entertaining ideas that are unpleasant or painful to us. We imagine we are looking for truth, or being realistic, when in fact we are holding onto the ideas that bring the release from tension and soothe our egos and make us feel superior. This pleasure principle in thinking is the source of all of our mental biases. I understand why so many people love his books. He uses archaic language, mention all those names, places, and stories we heard about before. This creates the illusion of mystic knowledge and mystery hidden in every word.

The Concise Laws of Human Nature - Profile Books The Concise Laws of Human Nature - Profile Books

The root of the Latin word for envy, invidia, means “to look through, to probe with the eyes like a dagger.”" Irresistible by Joshua Paul Dale delves into the surprisingly ancient origins of Japan’s #kawaii culture and uncovers the cross-cultural pollination of the globalised world 🦊 What I despise however is that many of the manipulative techniques he talks about, he also practices in the book. Here are my main problems with it: Looking at this from the other side, as a character in Dostoyevsky’s novel The Idiot advised, “When you are lying, if you skillfully put in something not quite ordinary, something eccentric, something, you know, that never has happened, or very rarely, it makes the lie sound much more probable.”"What you’ll find in this book are Greene’s interpretations of human tendencies uncovered by psychoanalysts 70-100 years ago spiced up with captivating mini-biographies of famous people that serve as proof. Most of all however, this book aims to teach you how to take advantage of these tendencies and use them to influence others to get what you want. Here’s a quote from the author that pretty much sums up the book: “All of this works best if the feelings are not completely faked.” The best way to handle recurrent depression is to channel your energies into work, especially the arts." Law of Aggression: See the hostility behind the façade. On the surface, people seem friendly and civilized. But beneath the mask, everyone has an aggressive side. Learn to recognize and manage chronic aggressors, counter passive-aggression, be aware of your own aggressive tendencies, and harness 4 positive aspects of your assertive energy.

The Concise Laws of Human Nature by Robert Greene - Waterstones

There is a scene in Community when Polonius, the egotistic senior expert of the king, uses instead turning as well as additionally useless suggestions to his child. In the 21st century there are a whole lot of Polonius- like numbers making use of suggestions to the young on simply exactly how to adjust to the promptly changing globe. The good news is, Robert Greene is not one of them. And the most common emotion of them all is the desire for pleasure and the avoidance of pain. Our thoughts almost inevitably revolve around this desire; we simply recoil from entertaining ideas that are unpleasant or painful to us. We imagine we are looking for the truth, or being realistic, when in fact we are holding on to ideas that bring a release from tension and soothe our egos, make us feel superior."Develop your rational self: (i) observe yourself in times of stress, (ii) examine the roots of your feelings and record your observations, (iii) wait before you respond, (iv) accept irrational people as facts of life (vs taking things personally), and (iv) consciously channel your emotional energy instead of being driven by them. 2. LAW OF NARCISSISM: Transform Self-Love into Empathy

Concise Laws Of Human Nature by Robert Greene | Goodreads

Visceral empathy: Pay attention to people’s reactions, e.g. facial expressions, body language and tone of voice. Use mirroring to develop a stronger connection, e.g. mimic their tone or expression, nod and smile as you listen. Law of Generational Myopia: Seize the historical moment. We’re strongly defined by the generation that we’re born into. Realize how history moves in cycles across 4 generations, understand how your generation’s spirit affects you, and how/where you fit in the wider generational patterns. Then, use several strategies to exploit the spirit of the times.The Law of Compulsive Behaviour. This one is about assessing the strength of people's character. Definitely one of my favourite chapters in the book because of how well Robert articulated a few ideas I've been playing around with. It sort of builds off of the knowledge Robert drops on us in the previous chapter. He goes over how poorly equipped we are to gauge the character of the people we deal with because of how mesmerizing the public image they present can be. He goes over how little we know about how our minds work. Nobody likes to believe that they are operating under some kind of compulsion beyond their conscious control (FREE WILL IS AN ILLUSION). Quite a disturbing thought to entertain for some. In our conscious day to day life, we are sleepwalking, unaware of what we really are; we present a front of reasonableness to the world and we mistake this mask for reality. We constantly delude ourselves into thinking the story we tell ourselves of who we are is the reality. As Yuval Noah Harari puts it, "Life is not a story.". Pros: a great primer on the psychological tendencies that pull us all in certain directions, mostly to the detriment of our rational goals. Robert Greene identifies 18 such “laws,” providing historical and biographical sketches that demonstrate each law in practice. He then provides strategies for turning each law—with its inherent self-destructive tendencies—into an advantage. The author draws on a vast storehouse of examples, and his emphasis on rationality and examples from ancient Greece are well received. What we glimpse in these moments is the dark side of their character, what the Swiss psychologist Carl Jung called the Shadow. The Shadow consists of all the qualities people try to deny about themselves and repress." Of course its easier to say that people in France hate queues and love alcohol. Well written Robert. He might have done the same in his other books as well. But for some reason these anecdotes don't work here. After a couple of chapters, I found myself skipping the anecdotes directly to the part where he explained a particular law.

Concise Laws Of Human Nature by Robert Greene | Goodreads Concise Laws Of Human Nature by Robert Greene | Goodreads

Secrecy came naturally to John le Carré, and there were some secrets that he fought fiercely to keep, nowhere more so than in his private life. Seemingly content in his marriage, the novelist conducted a string of love affairs over four decades. To keep these relationships secret, he made use of tradecraft that he had learned as a spy: code names and cover stories, cut outs, safe houses and dead letter boxes. Beware of inflaming factors (or “high-grade irrationality”) which call up certain feelings and intensify them. These may come from (i) childhood memories that trigger strong positive/negative feelings, (ii) sudden gains/losses that bring extreme optimism or pessimism, (iii) extreme stress which causes us to get defensive, (iv) individuals who evoke strong feelings in us/others, and (v) infectious emotions from large groups. Watch out for these factors, detach yourself and contemplate the underlying sources. Best-selling author and public speaker, Robert Greene was born in Los Angeles. He attended U.C. California at Berkeley and the University of Wisconsin at Madison, where he received a degree in classical studies. He has worked in New York as an editor and writer at several magazines, including Esquire; and in Hollywood as a story developer and writer. TheBookOfPhobiaaAndManias traces the rich and thought-provoking history in which our fixations have taken shape.by presenting the book as Greene is presenting it, he does much more harm than good. Even if many of the tendencies exist, the author makes the reader believe that just by reading this one book they can go off interpreting peoples facial micro-expressions, tone of voice, behaviour etc. This is not only bad advice, but dangerous and can wreak havoc on one's relationships.