I love inflicting pain, both physical and mental, and am a sadist through and through. My favorite sorts of play are corporal punishment, medical play, CBT and ballbusting, nipple torture and heavy degradation scenes. I enjoy this sort of play because it draws these insane reactions out of the subs that make the session so memorable. It is, unfortunately, more unusual to see women than men. This is changing, and women are becoming more empowered to call upon sex workers to explore their fantasies. I had an interesting experience wherein a straight woman booked a session with me because she wanted to be dominated but felt safer with a woman than a male dominant, either hired or found online. I think that’s smart and savvy, and we had an amazing scene. Seeing a dominatrix isn’t necessarily about sex or sexual identity, it’s about submission, or masochism, or catharsis, and I love being able to take women to those places as well as men. One of my most loyal and thoughtful submissives just bought me a new car. He offered me any car I wanted and I chose one that fits my personal life instead of one that you would imagine a famous dominatrix driving. It’s a minivan. It breaks all stereotypes and is perfect. I would have to say that I don’t have much patience for newbies who do not understand the protocol of how to communicate respectfully and professionally with a dominatrix.

I am also a spe­cial­ist film pro­duc­er mak­ing high qual­i­ty dis­ci­pline videos for adult enthu­si­asts. Some estab­lished clients have com­mis­sioned short bespoke films (for exam­ple of their own ses­sion) for their pri­vate use. Please do dis­cuss this with me if it is of interest. Among others: Arrive clean. CLEAN. Immaculately clean. Clean like you are going to the doctor’s office and the doctor is going to make you bend in every revealing possible angle. Ses­sions are con­duct­ed in an atmos­phere of mutu­al respect. Please note I offer dis­ci­pli­nary ser­vices only and no sex­u­al activ­i­ties will take place. Although I don’t cane any­body to pulp, pun­ish­ments are giv­en seri­ous­ly. I am hap­py to pun­ish you on the bare bot­tom but don’t require full nudity. The strangest ones are the ones who ask for the most unexpected things. What's weird to me is not necessarily weird to the vanilla bystander, but my strangest session by far ended up with me writing two comparative essays for the sub. I first became interested in BDSM during my master's program in psychology when I chose to write a paper on sadomasochism. I wrote more papers on SM during my master's and PhD programs, then ultimately wrote my doctoral dissertation on erotically submissive men. During this time, I took workshops and classes on different BDSM topics, preparing myself to work as a professional dominatrix.That’s what you focus on, huh? Interesting. It amused Cass and she decided to file it away for another time. Over the years, my slaves would complain that they couldn’t figure out how to introduce their girlfriends or wives to female dominance. I co-wrote a book titled How to be a Dominant Diva which focuses on giving couples the inspiration and tools to explore eroticism, role-play and power exchange in a way that is exciting but never intimidating! A professional dominatrix is skilled at applying the right kind of pain that can make her masochistic, submissive client cry out in pleasure. There’s a common misconception that BDSM is always about pain, but it’s really about the sensations. You might be surprised to learn that a profession technically classified as “sex work” does not involve any actual sex. Sure, you can go online and find someone who will gladly take your money, slap you around a bit and then have sex with you—but that’s not a service provided by a dominatrix. A truly professional and experienced dominatrix is more like a guide through the less accessible sexual pleasure that some men—and women—find in the acts of submission or masochism, both in and out of a dungeon. This is why most sessions with a pro-domme (professional dominatrix) are carefully thought out and planned beforehand by the mistress to make sure they are uniquely tailored to, and enjoyed by, each particular sub. Prices (for pun­ish­ment ses­sions giv­en to a high stan­dard but with­out com­plex addi­tion­al requirements)

Always approach a mistress respectfully yet honestly and you’ll be fine. Trust she knows what’s best.Perhaps it’s easier to say what a Dominant is NOT. A Dominant, or a Dom (male) / Domme (female), is not a self-annointed title we bestow upon ourselves. It is not an excuse to tie someone up, spank them, degrade them, or use them however you please. Just because you call yourself a Dom does not in fact make you one. Being called a Dominant is a gift your submissive or submissives give you based on the care, protection, guidance, and love you show for them. It is earned. A Dominant is a listener, a communicator, a care taker, a protector, a leader, an earner of trust. A Dominant is selfless and will always put the needs of their submissives before their own. It is a great deal of responsibility! You, as a Dominant, are responsible for someone’s happiness and satisfaction, for understanding their needs and making sure they are met. Whether you are a full time Dom or a play time Dom, all of these qualities hold true. Be sure you are up to the task and take it seriously. Absolutely. Ideally, I would be friends with all my clients. I am there to open them up to the most sensitive and vulnerable part of themselves—there's a lot of trust and emotional closeness that is built. Some people want more than I can give—whether it's time, attention or specific acts—and in these instances I need to strongly enforce my boundaries, which makes it more difficult to have a friendship. Oxford English Dictionary (yes, I still own the two volume Shorter O.E.D. And I will never let it go.) tells us that Dominant by definition means: most important, powerful, or influential. Submissive, conversely, is defined as ready to conform to authority or will of others; meekly obedient or passive. and here, my fellow kinksters, we find our first measure of duality. The yin and yang. On the one hand we have power and influence, on the other we have obedience and passivity (you brats just hold your tongue for a little while). Pretty straightforward, but what’s important to recognize is that you cannot have one without the other. There is no power without someone to submit. There is no leader without someone to guide. Both are needed, and both are equal. Let me say that again and make it clear. Both the Dominant and the submissive in the relationship are, in fact, equals.

My favorite implements are my floggers and my singletail whips. I have the ability to play very light and sensual or heavy and sadistic if the person I am playing with wishes. Most people do not understand impact play, they think it’s about the pain, but that’s not always the case. Lambskin floggers are soft and sensual, and a person getting flogged experiences a sensation similar to a massage. I get a mental turn-on from it. The mental high of dominating someone and making them submit to me is unlike anything else, and I get so much gratification out of feeling them melt like putty in my hands when I push them past what they thought they were capable of.Being both a Dominant and a submissive means being uncomfortable, being vulnerable, open, honest, truthful, respectful, have a sense of humor, and a willingness to fail and grow from those failures. Some of you know and have known for a long time that you were one or the other. Some of you may have times where you feel Dominant and at other times submissive (this is called a Switch). Wherever you fall, just be really honest with yourself about who you are and know that whoever you are and however you identify, you is amazing and never let anyone make you feel otherwise. Coming up next... While the type of play I typically engage in doesn't involve physical danger, if I were to accidentally transgress, I do absolutely honor limits. I take some time at the start to go over a client’s limits, then monitor them closely throughout the scene. They range from the “newbie” who has an interest that's been sparked in him and is curious and seeking a safe person and place to explore all the way to those who've been playing in the arts of BDSM for 20 or 30 years and only want to play with someone who has the experience and knowhow to take them to that special place only an experienced dominatrix can. Someone came to me and wanted to do an interrogation scene in which they would be tortured to get the information out of them. His fantasy was to refuse and be blindfolded and shot! He was surprised when I agreed. We did the interrogation scene and I finally told him he would be executed if he did not tell me what I wanted to know. He wouldn’t, so I put him up on a St. Andrews Cross and shot him with a paintball gun. The red ink splattered on his chest and he loved it. He later shared that he had asked many others, and all refused. Sometimes you have to be inventive and have an open mind to fulfill someone’s fantasy. A submissive in many ways is the one who actually holds the true power in the relationship. It takes an incredibly strong person to be a submissive. In fact, I have curated a set of guidelines for baby girl to help structure her mindset and outlook for the day. When she feels lost, or unhappy, or struggling to find her inner peace, she can turn to those guidelines for help. One of those guidelines says: “I shall never think of myself as a weak person for it takes a strong female to commit to the drive inside me, to serve, to obey and to please my Master.” I’ve always felt this was important because it takes a ton of strength and commitment to be a submissive. You have to know yourself and your needs and be able to communicate them, but also know your Dominant’s needs and be able to identify them as they arise. It’s not easy being a submissive, but it can be incredibly rewarding.

No non­sense CP( Cane/Tawse/Strap — no role play nospe­cif­ic dress­ing up) or role-play ses­sion ( headmistress/Boss/Prison offi­ceretc) Ses­sions takeplace inmy study at a pri­vate Vic­to­ri­an cot­tage in Gilling­ham (Med­way inKent). Play in the [BDSM] scene provides a mental arousal rather the traditional sense of sexual pleasure. For instance, recently I had a session where I broke my slave. My slave was pushed to his mental and physical edge—he went as far as he could go with me. Cathartically, my slave let himself go, expressed his true vulnerability and wept. I am a sadist above all in the scene; I get a high from breaking someone mentally and physically. The combination of the two is the ultimate turn on for me. These experiences are rare achievements in the years that I have played. I cherish those sessions, and they are amongst the most stimulating for me. I'm going to keep that between me and him. And besides, in many ways, a private jet is more of a burden than a gift. Intuition, imagination and understanding the psychology of the dynamic. Use of the tools, equipment and bondage is the easy stuff and I’m great at all of that. I love nice equipment so my dungeon is fully equipped with the best of everything for most BDSM play.What I offer — I offer dis­ci­pli­nary ser­vices to mature adults, men and women, who feel the need to receive tra­di­tion­al cor­po­ral pun­ish­ment.Ses­sions are con­duct­ed in my study, which has been care­ful­ly dec­o­rat­ed and fur­nished to pro­vide an authen­tic atmos­phere and con­tains a vault­ing horse and a leather-topped desk for use in pun­ish­ments. Although occa­sion­al­ly a short warm-up is required, I am a firm believ­er in for­mal pun­ish­ment with the cane, tawse and strap. I do not offer ses­sions with domes­tic themes, for exam­ple, the “strict aunt” (but can rec­om­mend ladies who do, if that is what you are look­ingfor). There is no typical client. I see couples, women, CEOs, Uber drivers, married guys, virgins. There’s the client who saves up for six months to have a session that means the world to him and the client who just needs a thrill on his lunch break. It runs the gamut. I enjoy using my body to dominate and at 6’5” I’m quite imposing. That being said I do love my props such as floggers, collars and cuffs. My specialty is in tease and desperation play. There are many ways to put someone in “sub space”—a state of mind in which your inhibitions and ego go completely out the window and you are overcome by an utterly submissive feeling. One way to reach this state is via sexual desperation. By building up arousal over time without sexual gratification, eventually you reach a point where your sexual desires become too overwhelming to handle—it is a place where you are willing to do anything for gratification, and at that moment, my power over you is absolute.