This is what happens when thousands of people come together and share their funniest short jokes. I will never forget some of these, and you better believe my friends are hearing them. So. Funny.

Not every joke needs to be family-friendly or G-rated. Some of those jokes are dirty jokes (never appropriate but) always funny. Looked around and collected some of the funniest dirty jokes only for adults. Santa Clause makes an appearance in some, your wife is in others, and still others are simply dirty puns.People are always worried about their cell phones or microwaves spying on them. Truth is, those are not the appliances you need to be concerned about. It’s your Vacuum Cleaner that you need to be worried about – it’s been collecting dirt on you for years. I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car. If the family's sitting around the table for Sunday night dinner, go with something sure to go over well with the kids and adults in attendance like "What did the hamburgers name their baby?" We'd tell you the answer, but don't want to give all the good ones away just yet.

Did you know you can actually listen to the blood in your veins? You just have to listen varicosely. You know Tom; I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes me feel better, and I can go to work. You should try that. Now that you read out these inappropriate yet hilariously dirty jokes, we hope it made you laugh! Why not share these jokes at the end of the day when only the adults are left standing? Surely it will make them struggle to keep a straight face the entire time. A guy goes to the store to buy condoms… “Do you have a bag?”, the cashier inquired. “No,” the man replied, “she’s not really all that ugly.” What did the bald man exclaim when he received a comb for a present? Thanks— I’ll never part with it!

How to Tell a Long Joke?

Nevertheless, if you do not want an awkward moment for your children making them pretending that they do understood the joke – or you do not want them to use them, here I collected some clean jokes here that you can share with your teens at home (or wherever you want). Boss, I followed your advice, and I feel great! I’ll be at work soon. By the way, you got a nice house. How would you embarrass an archaeologist? Put a used tampon in his hand and ask him which period it came from!

Looking for Seriously funny jokes? Let’s send the children to play so the real fun can start. These might be dirty funny jokes that you can only share with other adults, but they will laugh so hard that they will cry. When you have some teenagers at home, you have to pay attention of what kind of jokes you tell. I do remember being a child and not understanding my grandma’s jokes. Then, as a teenager, I always got embarrassed hearing them telling them (and pretending I did not understood them). Even though I admit, then I could explain them to my school mates and I was the queen! At some point, you start also laughing with the adults in the room. I couldn't believe that the highway department called my dad a thief. But when I got home, all the signs were there. My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.

Joke Categories

A cement mixer and a prison bus crashed on the highway. Police advise citizens to look out for a group of hardened criminals. If you’re enjoying this article, you might also love A better way to communicate: Create stunning infographics with PosterMyWall