In the book, she denied several times that she was propagating a negative stereotype of Iranians. She explained that, "Iranians could not be placed into a single category of fanatical American haters". She also mentioned several instances of women who were not mistreated by their husbands, but also maintained, throughout the book, that most smugglers who helped people escape Iran could not be trusted. [1] Nevertheless, the book and the movie of the same name have been criticized for their representation of Muslim Iranians and of their culture. [3] Betty woke up the next day filled with fear. Moody sent Mahtob to school and insisted they go to SwissAir to hand in her passport. She reminded him she was due to go to the market with Chamsey and Khanum Hakim. Moody insisted they go to SwissAir first. Moody was furious she had not come home straight from the appointment but bought the excuse that the buses caused delays. He took her to the passport office to personally ensure the correction was made. Not Without My Daughter and My Name is Mahtob both paint a picture of Moody as a stubborn, obsessive monster. By this logic, he should have followed them to the States as soon as they went missing. As both books testify, he never actually showed up. This question is answered in Lost Without My Daughter. Moody relates how Betty pushed her departure until after his green card had expired, and she took his Iranian passport with her, buying herself some time. There are many things the author wrote about that are very typical of Iranian behavior, things that I have grown to love about the culture (the best food, the love of tea, the strong family unit, the way they seem like they're arguing when they're talking). My husband agreed that for the most part, it did represent the culture accurately. (Except for the uncleanliness part - my husband's family are all very clean, almost afraid of germs.)

It's difficult to read this book. Not least because the syntax and grammar, as well as the narrative, are poorly executed. However, it should be read. Betty’s mother talked Essey into giving her Betty’s phone number, and they were able to establish a routine to speak. Betty also became good friends with family friends of Moody’s, sisters named Chamsey and Zaree. They lived in the States for most of the year and only came to Iran for two months a year. Chamsey eventually learned of Moody’s treatment of Betty. She stayed silent as per her promise to Betty, but her attitude towards him cooled considerably.

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All is seen from the point of view of Betty, who is shown surrounded by harsh, cruel religious fanatics. I went to Iran, became completely sure that the book and the film are nonsense. So much so that it’s even not polite to mention it before Iranians. Like, say, stories about brown bears playing in the middle of a Red Square and dining on unfortunate tourists. When she eventually got to spend time alone with Ellen, Betty learned Ellen had stayed in Iran because her parents were too old to support her and she had two children. She learned that Hormoz regularly beat her and the children. But her life depended on him, so she stayed. Betty asked Ellen if she could help her by creating excuses for her to leave the house alone. Ellen agreed, and they devised plans on how they would get Betty out by herself. When they arrived at Chamsey’s house, neither of them could control their emotions and got into a fight. Chamsey tried to interrupt, but Moody stormed off with Betty. He dragged her to Aga Hakim’s house. They wrapped up the errand and went home. Mahtob felt the fear in the air and begged Betty to take her to the US that very day. Sadly, Moody didn’t appear to be much better. When Betty ran away with their savings, he assumed her impoverished life contributed to that. There doesn’t seem to be many accounts of Moody sitting down with Betty to understand what prompted her behavior. He claims any attempt to speak to Betty ended with her having an epileptic fit. Since these aren’t mentioned in Betty or Mahtob’s books, it is nearly impossible to validate the claim.

With this book you have to keep in mind the time in which it takes place. It's a time of turmoil and war. Things were chaotic. It was also written before things like the Internet. Betty planned a thanksgiving party with Alice, and they ventured out on several shopping trips. Alice showed Betty where she could make long distance phone calls from, and Betty gleefully told her family she would be home for Thanksgiving. Mahtob’s birthday was nearing, and Betty insisted on having a party on the day instead of on a Friday as was customary in Iran. A few days before the party, Mahtob hurt herself and needed stitches, which had to be administered without anesthetic. This unfortunate incident intensified the need to ensure Mahtob had an excellent birthday party. Broeske, Pat H. (January 22, 1991). " 'Home Alone' Fends Off Yet Another 'Intruder': Box Office: Vietnam War film opens to mediocre business as comedy remains on top for 10th week. After four weeks of release, 'Godfather Part III' drops to 12th". Los Angeles Times . Retrieved 2012-06-03.

Moody didn’t seem to be looking for a job, and all he did by way of inquiries was to send his nephews out to ask after the status of his physician’s license. He spent his days lazing about the house and began to attend anti-American rallies. It was on one of those days when Betty found herself alone with his family, all gradually succumbing to their afternoon slumber. She saw an opportunity to call the number of the US Interest section of the Swiss Embassy that her mother had given her on a stealth phone call. She wasn’t able to speak to anyone as she was trying to be as quiet as possible, but Fereshteh saw her on the phone and told Moody as soon as he walked in. He had an absolute fit and threatened Betty like never before against using the phone again. Lost Without My Daughter suffers from its own version of classism. Where Not Without My Daughter seeks fault in Iran and Islam, Lost Without My Daughter does so in social status and affluence. Moody repeatedly claims he bought Betty expensive things to calm her temper and nerves. In the States, it was a lavish house, furniture, etc., and in Iran it was gold, Persian carpets, and other luxuries. One has to wonder why he never questioned the need to repeatedly calm her using material objects. The trauma of witnessing abuse and the unresolved nature of resentments is obvious in Mahtob’s state of mind and health within My Name is Mahtob. Sadly, children are always the real victims. Perhaps worth the read, but only if it's free (which it was for me in the lending library) and then interesting to read after the other two. Interesting to see how he actually either believed his lie, OR was forced to write it to defend his country. I do not believe he loved his daughter in a true parental love, even after reading his "side".