Coming out of a toxic relationship and hating being alone I have now been very happily single for over a year now and this book explains the joys of being single so well. society has consciously or unconsciously programmed our brains to think that marriage and starting a family is the ultimate goal of life, but no! it's 2020 and we should be able to do and live as we please. what i have taken from this book is that i have bloody high standards and boundaries that should never be broken, it will take a very very amazing human to convince me of the idea of marriage, if this person does not come into my life then i will happily and proudly remain single! There are far better-written books on the joys of solitude, how its distinct from loneliness, why increasingly people are embracing solitude and what do we gain from doing so. For starters, I would recommend these: So what’s going on in your love life?’. An innocent question at a dinner party prompted Aimee Lutkin to finally tell the truth; it was six years since her last relationship, and she suspected it would be better to accept the life she had – a life she liked very much – rather than keep searching. But Lutkin’s answer was met with uproar; surely she couldn’t give up on love? So she threw herself into dating, going on two dates every week.” Sound familiar? You don’t have to be single to enjoy this book – the techniques Gray suggests to help self-soothe are useful for anxiety. And for those in a relationship, it raises important questions about co-dependency and who you are as an individual. It is comforting to have someone rationalise your most irrational thoughts, the weird hypothetical situations you create in your head before actually meeting someone, and those intense digital connections which fray rapidly in real life.

More than half of Britons aged 25 to 44 are single. Babies are arriving later, marriage is no longer synonymous with forever and many of us tie the knot in our thirties, forties and older, if we choose to marry at all. So why do we still cling to the idea that marriage and children mean happily ever after? South Korean universities are now running ‘Marriage and Family’ courses in which it’s mandatory for students to date three classmates, for a whole month, each. (It’s unclear whether they get to choose who they date for four weeks.)”The book encourages you to re-evaluate your assumptions about singledom and find the contented single in yourself.

Finally, during the interview, Catherine mentions how feeling overwhelmed and having ‘single sorrow days’ are normal and okay. Despite writing the book, admittedly she still has days like this, where her candour is to be admired. With humour, The Unexpected Joy of Being Single sets out to help us be happier and content, as singles; but reassuring in reminding us we’re also, still human after all. Many people are under the impression that being single is some unfortunate thing that happens to us, but what if it’s a conscious choice we make? This memoir from a 40-year old single woman will resonate with people of all ages. This is the perfect read for independent women who love their own lives and don’t feel the overwhelming need to couple up. Sophie Tanner embraces ‘sologamy’, the act of marrying oneself. Photograph: Image provided by Sophie Tanner Being single for an extended period - or for life - can be incredibly empowering, fun and emancipating.Being a well-researched book, Catherine includes various findings from scientific research to underpin the ideas found in The Unexpected Joy Of Being Single. She explores the three main attachment styles (i.e. the way we connect with others): anxious, secure or avoidant when it comes to forming attachments and how we relate to the important people in our life. Also discussed is HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired) because if we experience any one through the day, it may be the cause of common negative feelings. I am so glad I read this book (on a whim, because of a rail replacement bus), and I will certainly be revisiting it and recommending it to anyone who will listen. Catherine Gray went through all of this. And then some. She took a whole year off dating to get her love-hooked head straight. How do we chill our boots about our single status? Detach from 'all the good ones are gone!' panic? And de-programme from urgent, red, heart-shaped societal pressure to find your 'other half * '? We know intellectually that single is far preferable to panic-settling, yet we forget that almost constantly. Why? Psychologists and neuroscientists tell us? Let's start the reverse-brainwash and locate our happily-single sanity, for good. Are you in?

It's well-written, witty, honest, and an excellent book to dip in and out of. Funnily enough since my last review in 2019, and partly due to reading her book, I've really changed my perspective on being single and really do enjoy living a single life. Catherine Gray quotes from Alain de Bouton: "Only once singlehood has completely equal prestige with its alternative (coupledom), can we be sure that people can be free in their choices."How being single is often seen as a ‘waiting existence’. That is, waiting to find ‘the one’ and why it’s now a misguided idea. It was also fun reading a book by a writer who is the exact same age as me; I was loving all the cultural references which I could so relate to. It’s no secret that most people spend at least a chapter of their lives single. Maybe you’ve recently gone through a rough break-up? Or perhaps are just simply enjoying the independence singledom brings — whatever your situation, there’s a few aspects of single life that are fairly universal. From wondering if you’ll ever meet the right person to embracing a new identity, there’s a million different highs and lows. So, while the ins and outs of everyone’s situation is unique, there are a few inspiring books about being single that everyone should make a point of reading. The notion of the ‘grass being greener’ on the other side – when singles think life would be better with a partner and unhappy people in relationships dream of being single or with someone else.