Wright, Wendeline O. (2020-09-10). "Deesha Philyaw's debut short story collection explores faith and fidelity". Pittsburgh Post-Gazette . Retrieved 2020-10-18. How do you make love to a physicist? You send him an apology in the form of one of the many sketches of him you have made, in a silver frame. He doesn’t respond right away. And you’re okay with that; you knew the risk you ran, disappearing the way you did. But when he does reach out, you’re both quiet on the phone for a long time before you say, “It’s just something I had to do. For me. I didn’t have the words for it then, and I’m not entirely sure I do now.” You didn’t tell him how, one by one over the decades, you’d lost all your good girlfriends to marriage and motherhood, your friendships reduced to children’s birthday parties and the rare Girls’ Night Out.” The interview has been edited for length and clarity. Congratulations on being named a finalist for the National Book Award. How did you react to that news?

These are the kind of short stories that make me glad that I’ve given short stories a chance these last few years. My biggest issue with many short stories is the feeling that the story needs completing. While I didn’t love every story equally ( hard to do with a collection), just about every one felt complete . That’s not to say that I didn’t want more of Deesha Philyaw’s characters and writing. Any of these characters could fill a novel and I’m hoping for more fiction from this talented writer. But you want him to keep talking, to keep listening. Maybe invite him to come up? No, too soon. You don’t think he’s a serial killer. That’s not it. It’s that you don’t want him to think you’re that kind of woman. The kind your mother warned you not to be. So you have not been. You are forty-two.” He sighs. “Which is why I didn’t trip when you didn’t respond to my messages at first. I figured if you’d wanted me to leave you alone you would’ve said so. But you didn’t. Now I did trip a little when you ghosted me, but”—he shrugs and pulls you closer—“I figured you had your reasons.”Deesha Philyaw is a stellar writer. Her characters are nuanced, funny, and insightful. Many of her protagonists could have easily filled a novel. She is a writer to watch. Highly recommend. White, Peter (2021-01-15). "Tessa Thompson Launches Production Company With First-Look Deal At HBO/HBO Max, Will EP 'Who Fears Death' & 'The Secret Lives Of Church Ladies' Adaptations". Deadline . Retrieved 2021-01-20. Whether it's Jael from JAEL, Olivia from PEACH COBBLER, Leelee & Rhonda from SNOWFALL or even Lyra from HOW TO MAKE LOVE TO A PHYSICIST, it's different & stimulating versions of Women who have leapt to freedom who are either trying to convince other women to leap with them or who are at odds against the women who continue to walk this thin line. With its false sense of hope awaiting them at the end of it.

Warning: Do NOT open this book on an empty stomach!! The descriptions of food, peach cobbler in particular, will make you drool like a baby. DO open this book when you want to read a very robust collection of short stories full of strong and independent women. These are women that walk their own path, not the road others have paved for them. There are battles between their desires and those obstacles that get in the way more often than not. Judgments are passed on them through the conservatism of their church, but also by their families and society at large. They wage inner wars with their own consciences at times, too. White, Peter (2021-10-05). "Tori Sampson Boards Tessa Thompson & HBO Max's 'The Secret Lives Of Church Ladies', Will Write & EP With Deesha Philyaw". Deadline . Retrieved 2021-10-20. Then Pi Day arrives and you shower while he’s en route to the airport. Once he’s in the air, his six-hour flight (including layover) feels to you like an eternity. His walk from the plane to your car at curbside takes as long as a pilgrimage. You imagine him kissing the western wall of Sbarro, weeping at the Cinnabon, leaving an offering at the feet of Auntie Anne. Being very accessible and an easy read makes it even more impressive. I found myself wondering several times who is this woman who writes so well? Rodney Barnes Sets Scary Podcast Series ‘Run, Fool!’ With Ballen Studios, Eyes TV & Film AdaptationsI devoured this collection in one sitting and was blown away by Philyaw’s talent. The Secret Lives of Church Ladies was really fantastic. Eric pulls you down to the couch and kisses you again. “Oh, so we both win,” you say. “Here’s a participation trophy.” You go in for more kisses, and you think, God, let him be forever.

All of this cemented my understanding of God as a twisted puppet master watching his creations bounce around, trapped and tangled up in tragedies for his amusement.’ Is it better to have the one big hurt of your father not being around and not all those little hurts that come when he disappoints you? Or is it better to have a piece of a father, hurts and all?” The stories of these women and their friendships come alive, beating with tenderness and imperfection, and build upon one another to create a beautiful melody of female determination.” Breathtaking and heartbreaking. This book felt like a hot cup of tea and a warm bath after a long cold day.On top of the many secrets in the sex lives of these characters, there also are what seem like superstitions, especially among their relatives — like the grandmother who dreams of fish and is then sure someone in her family is pregnant. What does that say about the influence of factors other than faith in the minds of some church ladies? Eric strokes your furrowed brows until your face relaxes. You say, “Rumi said, ‘Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along.’ Do you believe that?” You try to remember the last time a man made you a promise. You decide it doesn’t even matter. This man is making you one now. That’s what matters. The stories are all very poignant, sometimes laced with heartache, sometimes with humor. The connections between these women and their lovers, their mothers, and their siblings are explored so intimately, without a single wasted word. These relationships are never simple. Are they ever?! I loved the complexity of their thoughts, the turmoil, and the yearnings. Some of these “church ladies” are grieving; others are full of anger, perhaps even vengeful. They may miss home, their mothers, or other loved ones. They are all linked together by their love, determination and courage. Philyaw shows the Church as another extension of patriarchy oppressing women as well as a too-rigid institution that shames people into compliance. This is echoed in How to Make Love to a Physicist as well: