How much to contribute to his 401K, which clothes to get rid of in the closet so we (read: I) would have more room. Since I believed I was smarter than him, this was only logical. 4. Shooting him disapproving looks. Me and my husband are not talking with each other. I am trying to overcome his behavior but don’t know why nothing is getting materialize. have come across your how to control husband article.

Mommy of 4, what you’re going through sounds exhausting. You are doing so much! I admire your courage and commitment in fighting for your marriage all these years. When I started practicing the 6 Intimacy Skills, I felt discouraged when I encountered resistance. I had done the old dance for so many years that it took my husband time to catch up to my new dance steps! Having the support of other surrendering women really helped me.Medical professionals, including nurses, view themselves as a class above the general population, and they are. Hubris is natural to them, so is contempt for “lesser beings”. It’s all about class level and treating the lower-educated like dirt. Humiliation is related to embarrassment, but is typically longer-lasting and more painful. A person might feel embarrassment after misspeaking or performing poorly on a test, while humiliation tends to go alongside more significant public failures. Humiliation also sometimes occurs with trauma, particularly physical violations. Rape and assault victims, for example, often report feeling humiliated. Incidents and feelings of humiliation can both lead to serious mental health problems. Generalized anxiety and depression are common among people who have experienced public humiliation, and severe forms of humiliation can be crippling, causing a person to abandon his or her interests or stop pursuing goals. When parents use humiliation as a form of punishment, the consequences can be particularly damaging. Children who have been humiliated by their parents may suffer from chronically low self-esteem as well as a host of mental health problems. I’ve been alone for a long time now, so it doesn’t make much difference in my day-to-day life. I’m sad that the happy, bubbly, open version of ‘me’ is dead. I have a barbed wire fence wrapped around me now and I no longer believe in love, romance or any of that junk. It’s turned me very cold. I’ve always gone out of my way to make everyone else feel good, offer support, cheerlead them, spoil them with gifts, try to make everyone else’s life a bit better. I’m done with that. Other than a handful of relatives, I’m not wasting my time or energy any more. I’ve learned the hard way that when you are nice to people they just see a giant ‘idiot’ sign on your forehead and think they can take advantage of that.

It’s sad to hear so many people going through similar experiences. I hope some/all of you are doing better now. I thought I was doing ok and had recovered. I was bullied throughout childhood both at school and by my dad, then handed over to a pedophile, raped, stabbed and treated as a sex toy for a while in my teens. I had an interesting start to life. Then later on as an adult I had a very abusive relationship with someone that left a few more scars. But I had a lot of therapy and had built up my self esteem again and was starting to do ok. Connie, it is so painful to have such a disconnect with your husband, especially after the changes you made. I really admire your commitment in choosing your faith over your fear.

People would ask him questions-doctors, waitresses, delivery people–and I would answer for him to make sure that everyone got the right information and impression of our family. 3. Making decisions for him, like… The underlying message, no matter how you look at it, is that he’s a failure as a husband. In my experience, this wins hands-down for the most expensive way to try to control your husband. 7. Telling him how I would do things.