Step 1 : Take a seat on the floor with your legs stretched wide apart (the inner thighs might feel painful if you are doing the exercise correctly). The only other animal known to modify its genitals according to the social environment is the hermaphroditic acorn barnacle, a crustacean that grows a longer penis when its colony is sparsely populated so it can better reach its nearest neighbor. It is very widespread, naturally occurring in Argentina, Brazil, Chile, Paraguay, and Uruguay, and having been introduced to the Falkland Islands.

It's possible that the injuries directly benefit the males, however, either because they prevent the females from mating again or force them to spend more effort raising their fertilized eggs — and thus insuring that the male's genes are passed on — and avoid the strain of future liaisons. I then used all my strength to thrust my pelvic area towards my mouth and managed to get the tip of my dick to touch my lips. They feed most actively at night, so you’ll often see Ruddy Ducks sleeping during the day, head tucked under a wing and tail cocked up. The bean weevil, a type of beetle, has developed a less-than-pleasant device for delivering sperm into the female’s vagina: Its penis is covered with hard, sharp spikes.Dr Kevin McCracken of the University of Alaska, Fairbanks, and colleagues, report in this week's Nature that they have found a specimen of the Argentine lake duck ( Oxyura vittata) that has a penis as long as its body - nearly half a metre long. This self-serving satisfaction is quelled in men who would otherwise rape or do something ungodly to get their pleasure. This evolutionary quirk puzzled scientists for years until they observed the animal’s behavior – with up to a dozen males following one female, four heads are necessary to deploy more sperm than the competition.

First, if you consider yourself gay then you can practice dick sucking on yourself while pleasing yourself.

Unconfirmed reports circulate the net about guys unfortunately dying after attempting self sex when their breathing tube is cut off and they die of suffocation. This tentacle animal swims around in the ocean, but while it’s busy looking for food and checking out the sights, the argonaut’s penis simply detaches itself and swims away to look for ladyparts. If you are unsuccessful at giving yourself the pleasure you want, then this act might not be for you.

Dr McCracken and colleagues speculate that the giant penis may be an example of 'runaway' sexual selection, where female preference drives male anatomy to ever-greater extremes, as in the peacock's tail. Think of it like this: you have the best tool at your disposal to learn the craft and perfect the moves-your own body.Marine flatworms are hermaphroditic—meaning each flatworm has both male and female reproductive organs.

The lake duck holds the Guinness World Record for having the largest avian reproductive organ, from a specimen in Córdoba, Argentina that had a penis measuring 42. That’s one reason why they sport penises that are up to 40 times their size – the biggest penises in the animal kingdom (take that, Argentine lake duck!Male ruddy ducks like the one shown here develop penises that run almost the length of their bodies, but dominant males grow even larger ones when mating competition is around. The males often try to force copulation, but the complex mating geometry allows the females to retain control—most forced copulations do not result in successful fertilization.