If you want to deepen your connection with your partner, share this list with them. It can be a fun journey to embark on, and one that you won’t regret. Strengthen and deepen your love with a fun, ingenious program of eight life-changing conversations–on essential topics such as money, sex, and trust–from two of the world’s leading marriage researchers and clinicians. Navigating the challenges of long-term commitment takes effort–and it just got simpler, with this empowering, step-by-step guide to communicating about the things that matter most to you and your partner. Drawing on forty years of research from their world-famous Love Lab, Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman invite couples on eight fun, easy, and profoundly rewarding dates, each one focused on a make-or-break issue: trust, conflict, sex, money, family, adventure, spirituality, and dreams. Interactive activities and prompts provide motivation to stay open, stay curious, and, most of all, stay talking to each other. And the range–from the four skills you need for intimate conversation (including Put Into Words What You Are Feeling) to tips on being honest about your needs, while also validating your partner’s own emotions–will resonate, whether you’re newly together or a longtime couple looking to fortify your bond. You will discover (or rediscover) your partner like never before–and be able to realize your hopes and dreams for the love you desire and deserve. Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by John M. Gottman – eBook Details It's strange to me that our culture supposedly values marriage and family but yet spends very little time teaching people on how to survive those things. That, despite challenges, love and joy are inevitable when there's evidence all around us that it is regularly a source of struggle and dissatisfaction in people's lives. Wisdom I Went On 8 Dates With My Boyfriend Based On a Relationship Expert’s Advice. Here’s What Happened.

My partner and I read this book over a series of date nights starting in March 2020, and ending on New Years 2021. We took it slow, read the book carefully, and meaningfully asked and answered each of the questions, and having discussions about each date, our family history, and what we felt and thought about each idea and topic as they came up. This was a lot of fun for us. It allowed us to grow and get to know each other better, gave us good tips and information on how to interact with each other to reduce conflict and increase understanding, and made for some good quality time together; this is now a regular thing, and we will continue to read books together over the next year and maybe beyond. First the run of the motor. Then pop. Pause. Pop. Pause. Pop. Pop. Pop. In between a steady stream of pops, I could just barely make out the sound of his voice on a phone call. The five most common subjects that couples fight about are money, sex, in-laws, alcohol or drug use, and parenting.Julie Gottman, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and the cofounder and President of The Gottman Institute. She is the cocreator of the immensely popular The Art and Science of Love weekend workshops for couples, and she also co-designed the national clinical training program in Gottman Couples Therapy. She is Author/co-author of five books: Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage, And Baby Makes Three, 10 Principles for Doing Effective Couples Therapy, The Man’s Guide to Women, and The Marriage Clinic Casebook. Julie lives in Seattle. This is my first time reading a relationship advice book. I love how much this book is centered around not just learning but doing. Each chapter has a planned date with discussion questions to challenge you and your partner to learn from everything you've read in that chapter. Gottman's decades of research have provided insights into and how relationships succeed and fail. That would be enough, but he also shares personal successes and failures with his partner and collaborator, Julie. In other words, the Gottmans are not asking anything of us, that they don't already ask of themselves.

They said when couples are considering marriage, they are often so fond of each other that they assume the other person wants the same things in life as they do. Their optimism convinces them there’s no reason to talk explicitly about decisions like where to live or if they want children. Unfortunately, by the time they discover their incompatibility on some of these fundamental values, they’re already married. As we made our way through the eight dates, we shared long-forgotten stories from our childhoods, rediscovered the power of rituals, revealed our fears about money and sex, debated how many kids we wanted, and shared our dreams. By the end, we agreed it made our relationship stronger.The Gregorian calendar is the most prevalently used calendar today. Within this calendar, a standard year consists of 365 days with a leap day being introduced to the month of February during a leap year. The months of April, June, September, and November have 30 days, while the rest have 31 days except for February, which has 28 days in a standard year, and 29 in a leap year. Doctors John and Julie Gottman have spent over three decades studying the habits of 3000 couples. Within 10 minutes of meeting a couple, they can predict who will stay happily together or who will split up, with 94% accuracy. Based on their findings on the ingredients to a happy, lasting love life, they have now created an easy series of eight dates, spanning:

Das Ding ist: ich glaube, wir sind absolut nicht die Zielgruppe für dieses Buch. Es gab kein Thema, was wir in den letzten 3 Jahren nicht schon mehrfach besprochen hätten. Vielleicht liegt es daran, dass wir als Gen Z couple im Vergleich zu älteren Generationen schon durch social media, höhere Akzeptanz für sowas wie Psychotherapie und generell mehr Offenheit für intime Themen früher gelernt haben, dass man über Gefühle sprechen und sich selbst reflektieren sollte? Don‘t know. Wir haben das erste Gespräch geführt und dann damit aufgehört. Ich habe das Buch alleine zu Ende gelesen und es entstand bei mir kein Gesprächsbedarf. Full Book Name: Eight Dates and The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work By John Gottman 2 Books Collection Set Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, written by the Gottman's of the Gottman Institute, is a book about growing, learning about and supporting your romantic partner. The Gottman's look at some of the main sources of conflict and misunderstanding in relationships, and break these categories down into eight dates covering the following: trust and commitment, conflict, sex and intimacy, work and money, family, fun and adventure, growth and spirituality, and finally dreams and aspirations. Each date contains a paragraph to read, with questions to ask and answer for each partner. What really makes a relationship work? How can we stay interested in our partner for ever? How can we be happier in our marriage?While the expectations for marriage and partnership have never been higher, and the challenges have never been greater, it isn’t a coin toss. It’s not chance. It’s choice.” Der Input an sich ist an den meisten Stellen sicherlich sehr sinnvoll und richtig. Manchmal fühlte es sich aber ein bisschen von oben herab an und als ob die Herangehensweise der Autoren der einzig perfekte Weg wäre. Seltsam fand ich zum Beispiel, dass sie meinten, dass man nicht mit Menschen außerhalb der Beziehung über Probleme in der Beziehung sprechen soll. Das sehen wir nicht so und handhaben es auch anders. What we learned: I wasn’t expecting it, but this was by far our hardest date. Sex is a sensitive topic for most people. It might have been the subject matter, or perhaps we were just in a bad mood, but this date veered off course in an unproductive way. Although I won’t kiss and tell, it’s important to know that sometimes these conversations aren’t easy. For those of you going through the eight dates, I recommend taking a break from each other for 20 minutes anytime you find yourself or your partner getting floodedso you can reset. Scott shared a hilarious story about how his mom refused to buy him JNCO jeans — the pinnacle of fashion for middle schoolers in the late ’90s. This led us down the rabbit hole and we Googled the jeans ( here). No wonder his mother refused to buy them.