When you feel afraid, sit with that feeling and try to uncover why you feel that way and how likely those fears are to come true. For example, if we have long wanted to take someone to court for something awful that happened to us as a child, that’s a great reason to find your bravery. Courage always involves choices which affect others, and which cause you to move forward or hold back—based on your discretion.

Pay attention to when your child speaks longingly of an activity or challenge that they don’t think they can face – that is both a sign they might need some encouragement and a tell that this is an area of value for them. I know when my own child is at that right level of challenged (but not overwhelmed) when she’s singing a lot – if I regularly hear her rich alto rising from the floorboards, all is well. And the funny thing about these brave acts is that they never feel brave while we are doing them; instead, they feel scary, painful, necessary, overwhelming… anything but brave. In addition, as with all things parenting, how you implement the suggestions should be tuned to your particular child and their strengths, challenges and unique ways of experiencing the world.I want to share with you what my life experiences have been with learning to be brave and persistent. Far too many youth are growing up without such supportive mentors – and far, far too many are growing up in situations of active abuse, neglect, poverty and discrimination. To prepare yourself to do a brave thing without feeling like you're leaping off a cliff or flying entirely by the seat of your pants, try making a plan so you can think through and prepare for every small step. Confronting your fear is about understanding the underlying reasons why you’re afraid in the first place. The more you know, the more tools you have to navigate daily life, and the more capable you feel in multiple areas.

And if your child is considering whether to join the track team but is worried about the time commitment, you might remind them of an autumn when they spent every Saturday morning painting a mural at school.We work hard to bring you the most trustworthy, expert and up-to-date information on psychology and mental health in our Guides. You miss out on developing strong emotional skills that you need to succeed in your personal and professional life. It is productive for your young person to know that you, too, have fears and impulses to withdraw or avoid, and that you value facing challenging situations anyway, and usually benefit from doing so. I remember the day I told a friend for the first time what was really going on in my head and heart. Group positive affect occurs when the people you spend time with influence your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors in a positive way through a shared experience, like collective bravery.

You might find it helpful if you’re already convinced that your young person needs to be encouraged to face challenging situations, and you want some tips on how to help.When your plans don’t pan out, take the opportunity to assess what went wrong and what can be improved next time so the mistake doesn’t happen again. A study from 2023 notes prosocial motivation is beneficial if you’re in charge because it reduces anxiety about being in power and leads to greater leader well-being.