Asked what advice she would give to women in similar situations such as hers she says: “Don’t do it. Don’t enter into close relationships with the other sex when you’re married, even if it starts out as strong friendship. Unless it is a mutual friend, and the friend is present in your everyday life in clear sight to your husband and is not a secret, don’t do it. If you think you have to keep this relationship a secret from your spouse, best friends, and family, it is not a relationship you should be having,” she says. What the stars do grandly, many others are bound to be doing modestly. Furin is as old as love, but the ubiquitous cell phone, notes journalist Sanae Kameyama in her exploration of the subject for Shukan Asahi (Aug 15), makes almost easy what once had to be accomplished with a great deal of stealth. Consequently, there’s more furin than ever.

However, while waiting she notes that the affair had finally jolted her husband into communicating better with her. They were now speaking without barriers between the two of them as they had already been through a very sordid experience and they felt there was nothing further to hide.

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I did love my husband – he is also the father of my child and we shared some important things together,” she says. Well, I see no reason to take such stabs at me. I have provided a link showing how the word has changed in Japanese. I gathered from it that the meaning was originally simply "immoral" a word that certainly can be associated with adultery, but is not limited to that meaning by any means. Today, however, in Japan, if you say "furin" at all it seems the chief meaning is "adultery". And that change is far newer than the English use of "fling" for adultery, and it came about during the English boom.

It is just as easy to dream that he is all yours forever when he clearly isn't as it is when the odds are good he isn't. Those are generally your choices, because you may get divorced or he may have cheated. I wanted to fix what I ruined, but also make it better because it was not a good relationship pre-affair, to begin with,” she notes.I suggest enjoying the moments in life you are given, and the special people you can when you can, but be selective. All your post has given me is the impression that it is not so much the man that gives you pleasure and fulfillment as your imagined hold on him. I can't express clearly enough what a turn off that is for me and how shallow and short-sighted I find that outlook. I prefer to love people for who they are rather than what they can give me. 1 I had forgotten to delete a message. But when he found out he was livid. And rightly so. He was so, so angry and told me he was going to take my child away from me and file for divorce. That was the first time I realized the gravity of what I had done,” she says. Naturally. “Furin” -- the sort of love that’s supposedly off-limits to the married -- has been much in and around the news since celeb announcer Mona Yamamoto was spotted last month at a love hotel with married Yomiuri Giants slugger Tomohiro Nioka. Big deal, you might say, but she (who had been through all this once before) lost her anchor spot on Fuji TV’s new news program “Sakiyomi,” and he was suspended for a time. So in that sense, if in no other, it is a big deal. I needed to hold vigil for my relationship. For a very long time, it felt like I was just was waiting for forgiveness while remaining repentant and trying to work on my marriage. It seemed to me that I had to be patient for a very long time, years in fact, but I am glad I did. I know that seems like a very anti-climatic answer but that’s exactly what I did. I waited – a lot,” she says. However, how does one start to fix something that may seem beyond the point of repair, after such an upheaval?