Focus more on the vital few than the trivial many.80% of results come from about 20% of your actions. We can bend and stretch time by changing our perception of it (we will always have enough time for the things that are important to us), choosing to not rush (stepping out of frazzled, chaotic energy), and fully inhabiting the time (Kairos). Ever since my first book, Money: A Love Story , came out in 2013 I’ve been waiting for the “next big thing” to emerge.

The plain fact is that the planet does not need more successful people. But it does desperately need more peacemakers, healers, restorers, storytellers, and lovers of every kind. It needs people who live well in their places. It needs people of moral courage willing to join the fight to make the world habitable and humane. And these qualities have little to do with success as we have defined it.”— David W. Orr, Ecological Literacy. Weekly Planning Marie: I want to wrap this up with talking about what is hard for most of us, this gets a big hand raise from me: asking for help. I still have trouble with this. You know, I’m coming up on my own book and so that will be… Everything is Figureoutable will be coming out and I realize, I’m like, oh this is such a great growth opportunity for me because I’m so not used to asking people for anything and now I need to ask for help. It’s pretty straightforward if you have a normal, healthy, regular 28-day menstrual cycle, but there are so many reasons that may not be the case. We actually had a planner and it was only available in our membership, Origin ® , about growing your business while doing less. (Doors are currently closed but you can get on the waitlist for the next time we open enrollment .) Sentences that made me wonder if I should stop reading were: "But the craving for chips wasn't coming from a place of emotional emptiness or stress where I was trying to cover something I didn't want to feel with salt and fat. Nope, it felt really different. The feeling I had about wanting potato chips felt very visceral, like totally primal. It was a very clean feeling, unsullied by my emotional needs."She has 14 experiments in useful areas as sleep and asking for help, but the chapters are heavy on anecdotal stories from her online community that she plugs in and after the book, and low on actual detailed experiments. Pareto’s Law of the Vital Few: 20 percent of our efforts produce 80 percent of results. I don’t know a coach or business entrepreneur who doesn't teach this, which means it’s super important! Northrup give us the following exercise to help us identify our vital few. When we ask often, we’ve strengthened the muscle and we get good at it and then it allows us to ask kindly and it is so much easier to think about… I think about in my marriage, when I’m cranky and I’m way past needing help, I am not easy to help and no one wants to help me because I’m awful and if I ask early and often, then it’s really easy to ask kindly where I can be like, hey babe, next week I’ve got this thing, can you get the girls at daycare and whatever, what have you, and it’s like, oh yeah, sure. No problem because you are being lovely right now. It has 3 main elements (and all of them are self-dated so you can start whenever you want and skip a day or two here and there): Ask for help kindly. Asking for help early (before we are in crisis) and often (strengthening the muscle), allows us to ask with love and kindness. We can be more thoughtful in our words and expressing appreciation.

As other reviewers have noted, her advice can be pretty unorthodox: especially her belief that the lunar cycle and menstrual cycle are linked. However, I think that there is validity in adjusting one's schedule based on how mentally/physically/emotionally available someone is during a given time period. No matter your circumstances, you’ll find productivity strategies here that will help you regain a greater sense of ease, purpose, peace, and control over your time and life. Marie: I like it. One of the experiments you talk about in the book is an experiment around managing your energy. Taking a peek around your world for energy drains, we shall call them, and I thought one thing and I’ve heard this a lot from our viewers. When I scan, we have thousands and thousands of questions that people have submitted for MarieTV, and a lot of times it has to do with navigating their relationships with other people. And those can be coworkers, that can be family, it can be your loved ones. Can you share the story about the friend that you had who you love her and she was fun and vivacious but she also came with a lot of drama? We can time-bend by setting the intention to bend time, choosing to not rush, and fully inhabiting the time (Kairos). We need to step out of the frazzled, chaotic energy and chose slow presence to expand time. The times we want to rush, we need to slow down the most.Kairos is suspended timeless time, and experienced only when we are fully inhabiting the time (fully in the moment). Kairos is qualitative; it’s all about quality. Happiness and satisfaction come from going through the process of learning and/or doing something new, something you love, and not from the end result. So enjoy and congratulate yourself on every part of the journey. She has some neat ideas about your menstrual cycle and which work activities you should do at which stages, and listening to your body, but I teach jr high. My work shows up M-F, 8am - 4pm, whether I am cycling or not. Resting while bleeding sounds luxurious. And being “out there” while ovulating is nice, but I need to always be out there for my students. I do agree that is has been overlooked for far too long and we need to focus more on women’s health and accommodate the needs of everyone - not just the cycles of men. Marie: Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I love it. Number two and this is so Kate Northrup, envelop yourself in an energetic bubble before seeing them. What the hell does that mean?

When you decide to become a time bender, you decide to be in control of your time rather than your time controlling you.” Have you ever found yourself in the murkiness of not quite knowing what was next for you? How did you deal with it? What came of it? I’d love to hear from you in the comments!On a regular basis (quarterly, annually, etc.), we should be taking time to refocus our vision, goals, habits, and actions. Spend time getting clear on your purpose, defining your vital few, and making a list of what matters to you. I like doing this quarterly, as the seasons change. It doesn't take more than an hour and it helps me get focused on my priorities for the season. Having clear priorities helps me from feeling overwhelmed when everything feels important. I will say yes to the lunch and the coffee date and the joint venture and the interview and the guest post. Because it all sounds fun! And profitable! And exciting! Marie: Yes, yes. It’s like rather than having dinner, you could put together a puzzle, you could go somewhere.

Does it need to be done right now? If not, capture it in your calendar for the week it actually needs to be done.Marie: Then the question becomes, what part, if any, am I playing in allowing this particular dynamic to continue? Ask for help early, before you think you’re going to need help. It’s very hard to help somebody who is in the middle of a crisis, and asking for immediate help can cause drama.