Christian Slater was, as Lisanne Falk recalls, Winona's discovery. His then girlfriend, Kim Walker, played Heather Chandler. The Heathers were rounded off with Shannen Doherty, the future star of Beverly Hills 90210. Heathers: Woah! Or forget the creep, And get in my jeep. Let’s go tear up someone’s lawn! Heather D hands the note to Martha. Heathers: W oah! Woah! Woah! Honey, whatchu waitin’ for? Welcome to my candy store. You just gotta prove, You’re not a pussy anymore. Then step into my candy store! You can join the team­ Heather D, Heather M: ­ or you can bitch and moan. You can live the dream­ Heather D, Heather M: ­or you can die alone! You can fly with eagles, Heathers: Or if you prefer, Keep on testing me­ Heather D, Heather M: And end up like her! Martha walks over to Veronica. Veronica, look! Ram invited me to his homecoming party. See, I told you there was still something there! This proves he’s been thinking about me. …Color me stoked. I’m so happy! Heathers: Woah! Honey, whachu waiting fo­ The Me Inside of Me” – Veronica, JD, Chandler, Officer Milner, Officer McCord, Mrs. Fleming, Students & Teachers

Kurt and Ram take turns chugging from the bottle. They will protect you, Defend you, Respect you, Befriend you­ Like Winnie­the­Pooh! Heathers: W innie­the­Pooh! Baby, baby, baby, they're so blue! My balls will work for you­ Heathers, Kurt: T hey will obey ya! They really need rescue­ Heathers, Kurt: L ike Princess Leia! Kurt, Ram: B aby, you gots to come through. Teach them to smile! You got no clue, How much these two, Depend on you! Kurt, Ram: P lease help them through! Heathers, Kurt, Ram: M y balls are in your court! Kurt, Ram: Y eah, yeah! You make my balls so blue! Heathers: Y ou make my balls so blue! Kurt, Ram: Y ou make my balls so blue! Good God! My balls! You make my balls so blue! Shut up, Heather! Sorry, Heather. JD enters. Heather Chandler is gone… It’s up to me to replace her. Replace Heather Chandler? Please. You need to worry less about me, and more about your reputation. Kurt and Ram have been telling the whole school about your little threeway last night. Threeway? Oh… But there was no threeway, nothing happened. I remember differently. I seem to remember there was a­ Kurt, Ram, and another student enter. Kurt, Ram: Big swordfight in her mouth! Boy 1: And she allowed it? Kurt, Ram: Big swordfight in her mouth! Heather D, Heather M: I t sure sounds crowded! And then we both went south, And planted our flags, My big salami, Kurt, Ram: Ba­bent her over like origami! More students enter. Students: W hoa­oh­oh! Whoa­oh­oh! Whoa­oh­oh! Whoa­oh­oh! Everybody was sword fighting, In her mouth! Yes, we're convinced it, Went down right in her mouth! JASON DEAN (JD) - 17. He is darkly charismatic, compelling, attractive, charming on the outside yet very damaged on the inside. Keen smarts and strong inventive comedy. Voice: Strong, confident belt to at least an Ab, A preferable; wide emotional range. HEATHER DUKE - 17. Whipping-girl of the 3 Heathers. When she finally becomes Queen Bee she wields power like a bulldozer. Alto for chorus. Voice: Strong belt to C, D preferred. Alto for chorus. NOTE: in certain choral songs Heather Duke and Mac can switch vocal parts as needed. JD - 17. he is darkly charismatic, compelling, attractive, charming on the outside yet very damaged on the inside. Keen smarts and strong inventive comedy.

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Well, if you want it to come true, then meet me at the cemetery. At dawn. Veronica hangs up the phone. Free pussy! And we don't even have to buy it a pizza! What?! They fist­bump and run off­stage giddily. We can start and finish wars, JD, Veronica: W e're what killed the dinosaurs. We're the asteroid that's overdue. The dinosaurs choked on the dust, They died because God said they must. The new world needed room, For me and you. I worship you. I'd trade my life for yours. We’ll make them disappear, We'll plant our garden here… Plant our garden here. Our love is God. Our love is God. Our love is God. Our love is God. Our love is God. JD approaches Veronica with a gun in his hand. Veronica stares in a horrified fascination. Whoa, wow… Is that real? Yeah… But we're filling it with "Ich Luge" bullets. Ich Luge...? What? My grandad scored them in World War II. They contain this powerful tranquilizer. The Nazis

What? Open the door! Heathers: O h no, oh no, no, no! You make my balls so blue, So please say hello! Hold 'em, Enfold 'em, Kurt, Ram: A nd never let go! Once you were geeky and nerdy, But they knew you're dirty. You've set them on fire, Kurt, Ram: W hatever you require, they'll do! So take 'em home to meet your parents! They'll wear a suit and tie, Heathers, Kurt: A nd a fancy collar! They'll sing a lullaby: Kurt, Ram: L a la la la la! Please make these balls not blue, Just for a while! Can't wait till later, Kurt, Ram: M y pants are rubbin', Like a hot cheese grater! Give me that! Veronica takes a bottle from Heather M. Look! Booze. Drink. Aw, thank you so much! You're are so welcome. Meanwhile, a young Brad Pitt auditioned for JD but was judged to be “too nice” for the role. Heather Graham was offered the part of Heather Chandler, but her parents didn’t approve of the script. Students: W hine. Go on and bitch and moan. Students: W hine. You don’t deserve the dream. Students: W hine. You’re gonna die alone . Heather D and the students close in on Heather M.. Heather D, Students: D ie alone, die alone, Die alone, die alone! Heather M chugs the contents of the bottle. Heather D and the students dissipate. Veronica runs onstage. No! No, no, stop, stop! Veronica and Heather fall to the ground, and Heather starts crying. Suicide is a private thing! Throwing your life away to be a statistic in USA Today? That's like the least private thing I can think of. But what about Heather and Ram and Kurt? If everyone jumped off a bridge, young lady, would you? Heather nods, ashamed. Probably. Veronica takes Heather's hand. If you were happy every single day of your life, then you wouldn't be a human, you'd be a game show host. Heather spits out the pills. Thanks for coming after me. You're welcome. BOY 2: PREPPY STUD – (16-18) Straightlaced, ambitious, blow-dried. Dreams of being even richer than his parents. Voice: bass (up to E) or baritone (up to G#).HEATHER DUKE - 17. Whipping-girl of the 3 Heathers. When she finally becomes Queen Bee she wields power like a bulldozer. Alto for chorus. Voice: Strong belt to C, D preferred. Alto for chorus. NOTE: in certain choral songs Heather Duke and Mac can switch vocal parts as needed.