Come Home to Yourself

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If this is our situation, it is important to have compassion for ourselves for not wanting to return home to face these places inside of us. And yet the only way we can heal them, move through them, and make our home a more cozy place is to turn toward them. As the teaching goes: “The only way out is in.” Or through. It’s not that I feel qualified for a task this big and important or particularly skilled or knowledgeable about how to truly make an impact, only that I myself have felt desperately weary, battered, hungry, and in need of a resting place. My body has been scarred, my chest has been broken open, hands calloused, knees bloodied, heart raw, soul-weary, and I know what it is to need help, community care, sisterhood.

When I gently asked questions to the cold/uncaring qualities, the responses were enlightening. I heard:If we’re not aware of what is happening in the moment because we are caught up in our thoughts or reveries, or in the grip of worry or other strong emotions, it’s like we have left our house. If we stay away for a long time, dust accumulates and unwanted visitors may take up residence in our home. Things like stress and tension accumulate in our bodies and minds, and over time, if we don’t tend to them, they can lead to physical or psychological illness. At times I envision the process of coming home as a journey through rivers and valleys, over mountain tops and through forest. We begin at birth and end when we take our last breath. I want to believe that the moment we take our last breath on this side of the veil, we wake up on the other side. I want this to be true. And if this is true, maybe I’ll meet my son again.

Then, as if by magic, the return to our natural state of unity consciousness begins to break through like the light of a new dawn. And we discover there is no longer a desire to keep running. In addition, when we begin taking ownership of the shadow, we must also understand that this work is not about “becoming someone else,”like the notion of an “improved” version of who we think we are. Oh brother, moving from place to place does not serve you well. Wherever you go, there you will also find yourself. Your shadow is always with you.” Romantic relationships can infuse our lives with the magic of intimacy and connection. But for many of us, that magic is fleeting—over and over, our relationships don't last, or if they do, they fail to make us happy. We find ourselves chasing unavailable love, sublimating our needs in service to others, or trying to save our partners from themselves, all the while abandoning the ones who need us most—ourselves.And I said to my body softly, ‘I want to be your friend.’ It took a long breath and replied, ‘ I have been waiting my whole life for this.’” – Nayyirah Waheed

Finally, after an episode of her screaming, purple with rage in response to the way I had handled a project, I realized it was time to take a deeper look at myself. If you are a resident of the European Economic Area (EEA), you have certain data protection rights. It is our goal to take reasonable steps to allow you to correct, amend, delete, or limit the use of your Personal Data. For the first time I began to recognize that this woman’s anger belonged to me, and what’s more, what I was seeing was just the tip of the iceberg. In Braving the Wilderness, Brené Brown writes that “true belonging is the spiritual practice of believing in and belonging to yourself so deeply that you can share your most authentic self with the world and find sacredness in both being a part of something and standing alone in the wilderness. True belonging doesn’t require you to change who you are; it requires you to be who you are.” My whole life has been a journey to freedom and as I inched my way toward 50, I felt a call to come home to myself. An invitation to stop running, trying to belong or find my place in the world, permission to remember and own the full, messy, glorious truth of who I am. Not who I used to be or how I wished I could be.She needs time, like we all do. Time to be ok with being ok. Because sometimes feeling right, after feeling so wrong for so long, is the hardest thing to get used to.” — JmStorm In the chaotic tapestry of modern life, inner peace emerges as a precious gem—a sanctuary we seek amidst the noise and distractions. "Come Home to Yourself" explores the essence of inner peace, guiding you toward its serene embrace. At its very core, the shadow is the collective name given to aspects of ourselves we are not taking ownership of because of fear.