Let all those feelings happen. Let all that change happen. If any. You might not notice a whole lot of difference, and if not, totally okay. There's no wrong answer. Hello, everyone. Today, we will be taking a bit of a look at trauma. But don't worry, it's not a super-heavy episode. I say "a bit of a look" because with the following two segments, we'll be talking generally about the subject, and helping orient folks to ideas about what trauma is exactly. You'll hear a Q&A as well as an interview with a somatic therapist, complete with a really cool visualization. In future episodes, we will be diving in deeper about how trauma affects the body, specifically around pleasure. Before we get to our first segment, I wanted to read a really nice Facebook message from a listener named KJ that we got last week. KJ says: "I've listened to and read so much in the realm of sexuality and sexual ed over the past few years in my self-training as an educator, and was so tired of the same old, then stumbled across your podcast, and HOLY SHIT!!!" That's all caps, three exclamation points. "Holy shit, I'm revitalized and filled with life connection and awe that I have been longing for. Really fantastic work. Thank you.: I have to say, I got this message on a day when I was feeling pretty down, and it just lifted me up. So thanks, KJ. I really appreciate it. Karen Yates: Right. Because if you identify one thing, then I'm positive, you're gonna identify another thing. Right? Karen Yates: And this idea of touch. I'm realizing what that might do for folks, to see that they have choices around touch. Understand that there's a whole menu. Karen Yates: Yeah. Let's give a hand here! [applause] So that was really cool, because I was feeling all groovy with my favorite thing, and I thought about my computer issues, and my head got all like, "Ehhhh," but then I moved the groovy thing into my computer issues. And all of a sudden I was like, "Hey, computer issues! I'm dancing with my laptop. Awesome." So any final words about taking that out into the world?

Elmo Painter: Yeah. There's all kinds of relational traumas, and smaller traumas, and cultural traumas. RASCOE: Now, there could be some high-minded motives behind Elmo's moods. As Fred Rogers told Terry Gross in 1984, one of his goals as a children's broadcaster was to assure kids... FRED ROGERS: That there are things inside them that are OK to talk about. They should know that there is a full array of emotions in life, and all of them are fine. It's what we do with them that matters. Next few moments were pure bliss, it felt as if Elmo’s feet were even on the ground. Which they werent. Bakugou was holding him up becahse he’s like 2 feet tall. Elmo couldn’t imagine the pain he’d be in after this, but it didn’t matter right now. He wondered how his Alpha felt.. Retractable penis? Those noises? Still, it didn’t matter. Until he felt a liquid in him and Bakugou dropping him.KEVIN CLASH: (Singing, as Elmo) La, la, la, la. La, la, la, la. Elmo's World. La, la, la, la. La, la, la, la. Elmo's World. Elmo Painter: I don't know anybody who was raised in a culture of sex positivity. All over the world, all different religions, there's some form of sex shame going on. We cannot escape it. RASCOE: Or the explanation could lie in the Muppets' origins in the "Mad Men" era as advertising pitch puppets. For the next part of this exercise, think of something that happened within the last few days -- maybe the last two days, like 24 to 48 hours -- that was irritating, or irksome, or just like blah! We're not working with any trauma right now, or triggers. We're just, like, somebody cut you off in traffic, or you just missed the bus, or you stubbed your toe, or, you know, your pet went potty on the floor, or your human pet went potty on the floor, or you know, something that was just irksome, is kind of what we're going for. Think of something like that. And now, notice how your body responds. Notice your breath, your heartbeat, your muscles, your attention, any of those emotional sensations.

Karen Yates: That's great. And I really appreciated that you brought in the angle that this person is already noticing that there is a discomfort. That's, you know, really laudable, and I'm glad you pointed that out -- that in the beginning stages of noticing, that's really the most powerful point. It's like, I am noticing now that something is not -- I'm not comfortable with something in my body when I experience intimacy. Matthew Amador: We are a Western culture that prizes answers, prizes solutions, prizes that kind of very linear way of looking at, "Okay, here's where my problem starts, and that's going to be where it ends." And it's much more complicated than that.Like, you walk into the bar, and you're like, "Oh, what am I feeling here?" Or, "Why do I want this one thing, versus this one thing?" Or, "Why do I like this one toilet paper better than this other toilet paper?" No, seriously, right? Do you like the fluffy, or the strong? Karen Yates: Welcome to Wild & Sublime, a sexy spin on infotainment®, no matter your preferences, orientation or relationship style, based on the popular live Chicago show. Each week, I'll chat about sex and relationships with citizens from the world of sex positivity. You'll hear meaningful conversation, dialogues that go deeper, and information that can help you become more free in your sexual expression. I'm sex educator Karen Yates. Today, we talk about traumas big and small, and approaches we can take toward more pleasure. Keep listening.

Elmo's World" is full of wonder and curiosity, cooperation and kindness. Who other than the fuzzy, red Muppet would ask babies how to do things?to Elmo] You're a somatic therapist, I'm a somatic sex educator. What does "somatic" mean? [laughs] Elmo Painter: Just one thing. Yeah. Then you can get a little bit of what you were wanting, coming into the situation, right? For more info on Elmo Painter, go to our show notes. And thanks for listening. [music] Next week, we talk with writer Meg Weber about her BDSM memoir, and publisher Sienna Saint-Cyr about their press' consent-based erotica. Thank you for listening. If you know someone who might be interested in this episode, send it to them. Do you like what you heard? Then give us a nice review on your podcast app. You can follow us on social media @wildandsublime, and sign up for newsletters at wildandsublime.com. I'd like to thank associate producer Julia Williams and design guru Jean-Francois Gervais. Theme Music by David Ben-Porat. This episode was edited by The Creative Impostor Studios. Our media sponsor is Rebellious Magazine, feminist media at rebelliousmagazine.com. RASCOE: That's Muppets creator Jim Henson and his puppets from a coffee campaign that ran from 1957 to 1961. And, of course, the Muppets also had a nighttime show.