Ten Things I Hate About Me: The instant Sunday Times bestseller

Product Information

As soon as he was old enough, he changed his name. He chose Tracini because his grandfather, wrongly, told him it was the original family surname. “My adult career has been trying to undo everything that I taught myself growing up about how to be like my dad.” He still adored his father; he just wanted to be his own person – whoever that was. How has the relationship changed him? “It’s given me something to live for more. Having Holly in my life has made me feel more capable of some sort of future, though I can’t think long term.” Tracini is developing a BPD standup routine, which he hopes to take on the road. “It’s called Ten Things That I Hate About Me. It’s basically a Ted Talk gone wrong,” he says.

Most importantly, it’s funny – I’m not a one for ‘misery memoirs’ – and laughter is the best medicine etc. It’s also superbly enlightening about this complex mental illness. Most people with BPD are undiagnosed as it takes a pretty serious crash to sit up and think: hey, something’s not quite right here. I feel that BPD is often a dirty word in the mental health world, but to see the realness and power that It holds over someone’s life is a real eye opener and I’m so glad, however hard it must have been to write, it is out there in public. Joes story is far from pretty and very heartbreaking at times and the reason behind him writing this book is one of pure honestly. Not only is this book moving but I feel it will be educational not only for those without the illness, but for those with it to know that it’s okay to feel these things. Former Hollyoaks star Joe Tracini joins father Joe Pasquale in Spamalot". Digital Spy. 15 April 2015 . Retrieved 17 April 2015. In one video, Tracini sings a song about the erectile dysfunction caused by his BPD; in another, he wears a snorkel and a thong to protect himself from Covid-19; elsewhere, he chats to Miriam Margolyes while she is chomping on a raw onion to ensure he keeps his social distance. Tracini is fascinated with language and wordplay. Why are bees’ knees so special, he asks; he has never even seen a pair. On another occasion, he breaks down the word hopeless – it does not mean he has no hope, just that he has less hope than others. At one point, he says he always feels empty – as hollow as a chocolate Father Christmas.

The actor spoke about how difficult day-to-day living is with the illness - he also told presenter Lorraine Kelly, that he has thought about killing himself several times - causing alarm to many watching from home. His television career started in 2004 when he was a guest on CITV STEM show Prove It!. He fully made his television debut in 2007 as Spike Bannon in My Spy Family airing on Boomerang. Following the success of the first series, he would go on to reprise his role in both the second and third series before the show eventually ended in January 2010. In 2007, Tracini was also cast in the role of Darren 'DK' Karrimore in a pilot for the new BBC Three situation comedy Coming of Age. The first series, airing in 2008 was well received enjoying an average weekly reach of 1.2 million. Subsequent second and third series followed, where Tracini continued to gain plaudits for his outlandish performances, however in 2011 the decision was made to axe the show. [23] In 2010, Tracini also played the role of Victor in the single series of the BBC Four comedy The Great Outdoors. Tear family away from the screen for Peter Pan treat". getwestlondon.co.uk. 16 December 2008 . Retrieved 17 April 2015.

But I had run out of options. I'd done everything I 'd been told to do and I still thought about killing myself every day. So I wrote this book to save my life. Feelings aren’t a choice. We don’t choose how we feel. The only choice we have is weather or not to tell someone about it”

Customer reviews

Despite having four sisters (three from his father’s first marriage), he did not much engage with other children or childhood. “I was a real novelty, because I spoke and thought like an adult. I wrote my own stuff and would do five to 10 minutes at the end of my dad’s act when I was seven years old.” He adored his father and wanted to be his double. “I’ve got hundreds of hours of me on film. And it is essentially me, this tiny little boy, being my dad.” Joe Anderton (14 May 2019). "Hollyoaks' Joe Tracini opens up about mental health struggles". Digital Spy . Retrieved 14 May 2019. The book also contains his dark sense of humor that fans have come to love. He will struggle with BPD all his life but he is much better than he was when all this started for him.

In my opinion, this book is a must-read for anyone trying to better understand other people's experiences, and to really appreciate that you can never, ever tell what a person may be going through just by looking at them. That being said, I can honestly say, that this is one of the most raw and honest books I have ever read. To see Joes life, soul and mistakes laid out on paper really takes willpower and strength. For me, the reason that I think this book is so impacting and moving is because he doesn’t write this out of a place of being ‘fixed’ or better’ but, as he says a number of time, he’s still broken and willing to give us an insight into that brokenness. The thing that I think I liked most (if that’s that right word to use) is making people see that just because you’ve been fixed once, it’s okay to break against, it’s not a once fixed always fixed kind of illness. Tracini can’t stand most of what is said in the media about mental health – he says so much of it is po-faced or exploited by celebrities to promote a product. “I used to be watching, thinking: ‘Yeah, great, when’s your album out?’” So many mental health narratives are sugar-coated, he says. “It’s empty and fluffy, like: it will get better. I’m a lot of things, but I’m not fluffy and what goes on up there isn’t fluffy. It’s not a nice little gif with a hug.” Coming of Age', 'How Not To Live' axed by BBC Three". Digital Spy. 27 May 2011 . Retrieved 17 April 2015.Despite his poor mental health, Tracini has had a stable professional life – he has rarely been without work. He left Hollyoaks in 2014 after a three-year stint, thinking he would go on to something bigger and better. But there was nothing bigger than trying to quell the voices in his head. He briefly returned to Hollyoaks in 2018, after his diagnosis, but acting gigs were increasingly hard to come by. Since 2017, he has presented the children’s TV show The Dengineers (“Basically Grand Designs for kids”) with Meryl Fernandes. In December, it won a Children’s Bafta for best factual entertainment show. Obrigada Joe. Foi uma experiência incrível e eu vou sentir falta das suas palavras nas noites de insônia.