I’m sorry that I am so apologetic during sex. I’m just not used to someone being so patient with me. I guess I am insecure because it’s hard for me to get out of my head sometimes. so instead of saying sorry, what I actually mean is thank you. thank you for being so patient. thank you for being so dedicated to me and my pleasure. thank you for never making me feel uncomfortable or shameful. thank you for being the most beautiful, kind, and caring soul. sex with you is something so powerful, we send ripples into other galaxies. As one queer poet to another, this is an absolutely beautiful collection of poetry. I love the way that this book takes you from being friends with someone to slowly falling in love and being happy in your relationship. I love the way that the author unapologetically talks about sexuality. Definitely a good read! karlee rose is a twenty-three-year-old queer poet looking to connect to the world with her poems. she has been writing poetry since she was a little girl and has been enjoying the bliss of sharing them. she has a science degree she probably won’t ever use. so for now, she shares her words with you. the ultimate goal of her poetry is to be a safe haven for the queer community, as well as bring representation to the poetry world: especially in regard to queer love. you probably don’t know this but every kiss, every conversation, every cuddle, every touch with you, brings me closer to myself. loving you is quite literally teaching me how to love me too. sometimes I feel gross, like there is something gross about being gay. and then you touch me, you look at me, you kiss me, and all of those toxic thoughts slip away. believing in you, is believing in me. loving you, is loving me. supporting you, means supporting me too. you are my biggest supporter, best ally, best friend. you are exactly what I need right now. “we” are changing my life.

permission to love (permission to feel) by karlee north

God, this book arrived to me in the right moment. The author describes everything so easy, just the way it is and the way I write stuff on my notes app at 3am. Is it sometimes sort of trying too hard? I wouldn’t say so. I insist, this is the way we all want to express our bottled up feelings in our phones, but we always end up by shutting down the phone because it never makes sense.peak, then we slowly lose the gift of feeling. so we need to be better about embracing it all, seeing, feeling, and experiencing as much as we can… until we can’t. this is for you. in the moments you spent curled up in a ball on the floor of the shower, waiting for your lungs to catch up with your need for oxygen. on the nights when all that you felt was sadness, when even being numb was too hard. on the nights you felt so unimaginably alone, so disconnected from yourself. on the nights you needed to be held, but laid on the cold floor instead. on the nights when your only companion was the pain in the voices of those who sang the sad songs ringing through your headphones. I’m sorry that I let you treat me like you did -like I owed you something. I’m sorry that you were what I thought I needed. thank you for showing me that I don’t need you. that you were never the one. I spent so many hours wondering if I had made a mistake letting you go. I was blinded by the butterflies and familiarity. I hope it comforts you to know that I found someone that treats me right. someone that respects and cares about me with all that she is. I hope you find happiness too. we learned a lot from each other. I learned how to value myself and what love doesn’t feel like. I used to wonder when we would be done kissing. I don’t do that anymore. I’m sorry that I didn’t give you clarity, I was too busy giving it to myself. I hope this letter finds you, in the stars or in a laugh or in a song that reminds you of me. that is all the closure I can provide.

permission to love by karlee north DOWNLOAD EBOOK [PDF] permission to love by karlee north

I’m realizing that putting words to feelings is scary. validating and allowing yourself to be validated is scary. life is scary. I haven’t been crying as much as I did last year. my heart isn’t something that I have to drag around anymore. I no longer cry myself to sleep or long for the things that I cannot have. I am so much more content now. and sometimes it scares me to not cry. because two years ago, the tears felt like they were keeping me alive. when I cried, that was the only time I felt anything. I lived a numb life. and I survived. now I smile when I open my eyes. I remember to look up at the sky. I sip my coffee with gratitude. I let my emotions ebb and flow, and every. single. moment. I feel so alive. Poems felt more like stream of consciousness that were later published without a second thought. After the first ten the motives started repeating themselves, I would have loved the author to have sat with their emotions for longer and actually make interesting observations. Further it would have been nice if she would have had tried to make it rhyme at least once. I wanted to feel more at times, and other times I didn’t want to feel at all. I wish it went on and went deeper into the mind of Karlee. So, I am giving this 4.3/5. this is a collection of poetry about love, loss, vulnerability, and connection. this book walks you through my personal journey of falling in love with my best friend and embracing my queer identity. this book talks about intimacy and teaches queer love and acceptance, through poetry.my heart is surrounded by golden armor. she is protected. she is fierce. she does not let anyone in. nobody gets to hold her. she wants to take off her armor, lose herself in your arms, but she keeps asking the mind for permission. and the mind keeps reminding her, that nothing lasts forever. so the heart sheds a tear and keeps her armor on, and turns you away because she is told to believe that this isn’t forever, but nothing is forever. that’s what makes life so magical and meaningful. the mind is so scared. the heart, a hopeless romantic. the soul, craving to feel: It's always hard to comment on the works of women and more so lesbian being a straight man, however, I connect on the poetic level and I appreciate the author's journey through words. I recommend this collection to anybody battling with sexual identity. You may be shown that it's ok to be who you are and end up in a good place with the right person. There are three parts: one for you, one for me, and one for us as a whole. The poetry tells the story of a person who falls in love with their best friend while simultaneously discovering who they really are. the coming to terms with being queer, both the experience and the realisation, as well as the acceptance that this may be her life. The fact that this collection of poetry may be read both as a story and as individual pieces is one of my favourite aspects of the book. my mind is so resistant to intimacy. I’m not sure when I became so closed off to the world. what a shame it is not to allow yourself to feel. to soak it all in. maybe that is the point of all this: to feel as much as we can until we can’t feel anymore. in our twenties, our senses

permission to feel by Karlee Rose North | Goodreads permission to feel by Karlee Rose North | Goodreads

sober me is really good at hiding it, but I am so attracted to you. the way you smile. the way you exist. the way you look at me. I just want to kiss you. to feel your lips. everything could make sense then. all I want is to be honest with you, but I’m afraid I never will be. I’m too afraid of rejection. and a world in which I’m gay. I don’t know how to feel. I don’t know how you feel… Also, if you’re not part of the LGBT community and fear you will not identify, just give it a try. I may not be part of the community but I had the chance to associate the authors feelings too much. Maybe not in my sexuality but in other aspects she describes clearly. I don’t want to be anywhere aleyah is not. I have started to look for her in crowds. hoping that she will turn the corner. I dress to impress her. I hope that she notices the little details of my outfit and when I play with my lips. I get jealous when she talks about other girls, but I don’t feel like I will ever be enough for her. we make the perfect friends, but neither of us know how to make the first move. it’s eating me alive. I cannot live with this secret much longer. the conversation is coming. I’m building up enough courage to set myself free. stay tuned.waiting for both of them to realize that forever doesn’t exist. all that exists is the present moment. love is not a forever gift. it is felt in each moment, until it’s not. your lungs couldn’t take in enough air, and your eyes grew raw from the tears. this is for the strongest person I know, even when she did not see her strength. this is for the girl who never gave up on herself. the girl who never gave up on me. this is for her. this is for me. this is for us. Queer poetry about unrequited love and hopeless pining sounded right up my alley, but a lot of the book is filled mostly with short, bite sized poems that sound more like shower thoughts and journal doodles. Lotsa platitudes and dull prose. Despite that I did like that it read more like a story and had a sense of continuity. The bits about anxiety and overthinking if someone feels the same as you were nice, and the last chapter was cute as they wrote more about everything working out and being in love and accepting their queer identity. It has beautiful poetry that warms your heart. It's a good one for everyone dealing with sexuality and societal issues with love. Everyone should know that they deserve love and are loved. There are poems in this collection that discuss topics such as heartbreak, intimacy, and the relationships that we make with other people. My coming out as homosexual and my falling in love with my closest buddy are both stories that are told in this book. The author raises awareness and teaches readers about LGBT love and acceptance via the medium of poetry.