Gary Bushell On The Box

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When Sir Galahad survivor Michael “Iddy” Iddon came home, he lived in a trench in his garden for months. Frustrated viewers must have felt bone-idle TV bosses deserved to face a public grilling over their failings – preferably involving Dilksy, that bald, scary bloke from the interrogation episode of SAS: Who Dares Wins. I’M A Celebrity is as welcome in Abergele as a coal delivery at Number Ten. Could locals challenge ITV for false advertising though? I looked up one of this year’s bookings and even Google said “Beats me”. Benny’s 1970s shows, repeated on That’s Xmas, have generated a tsunami of humbug. He’s been called “sexist”, even though blokes were the losers in his sketches, and “unfashionable” – heaven forbid!

Garry Bushell Garry Bushell

Top Drama: Top True Crime Drama: Des told the grizzly story of Scottish serial killer Dennis “Des” Nilsen, aka the Muswell Hill Murderer, over three gripping nights. David Tennant was mesmerising in the title role. Looking like a hybrid of Robert Peston and Louis Theroux, Tennant brought the callous creep to life, confessing his crimes in a flat monotone, like a tranquillised man reciting a shopping list.

The wee tubster seemed genuinely thrilled by Great Yarmouth, especially the historic Hippodrome Circus where Harry Houdini and Charlie Chaplin once performed. HOW does Craig Charles keep a straight face on Moneybags saying things like “Mike moves from the hole and he goes into pole”?

Bushell Garry Bushell

What was going through your mind?” asked the interviewer. “A 7.62 high velocity bullet,” he replied. ANYONE notice that the 70s picture killer John Cooper had of himself on his wall in The Pembrokeshire Murders was the dead spit of a young Bobby Ball? If you spot a great TV lookalike please let me know. Random Irritations: The snidey war on GB News conducted by extremists who want to close down free speech. I will boycott every firm that pulls their ads. Funny moments included Alice’s visit to the “morgue” – shouldn’t that be the mortuary? – where she’s shown the corpse of a much fatter man.

CLASSIC CLANGER: ANDY Gray was talking about giving away goals when he said: “The most vulnerable area for goalies is between their legs.” Jaega “the Jaega-meister” Wise heads the experts. James showed considerable restraint by not telling her “You’re boozy-ful”. Hic. Cheers. QUIP of the week from Terry Cant: “He’s as happy as a bloke with haemorrhoids on the Tour de France.” It isn’t all bad though. The best thing the BBC have got right now is Inside No 9. It’s genius! Reece Shearsmith and Steve Pemberton specialise in fiendishly clever, darkly comic twisted tales.

Small Joys of TV: Street graffiti bursting into animated life on slow-burn Disney saga Ms Marvel. Johnny Cash on Later. Jim Davidson on Farage At Large – the funniest ten minutes on telly. Nigel “Spud” Ely – ex-2 Para and ex-SAS – said no British military engagement since “can compare to what we did at Goose Green”. My problem with James is he just isn’t funny enough to fill the shoes of Craig Ferguson, Leno, Letterman and Conan. Hero Gordon Zellaby, an erudite elderly author, has become family therapist Susannah Zellaby. And the brats are fashionably diverse, weaking their impact. Jan 17. THE Pembrokeshire Murders reminded us that TV’s Bullseye helped convict serial killer John Cooper.

In this fantasy world, only women wield magic. Wisdoms can “hear” messages from the wind – so best keep ’em away from Miriam Margolyes. And witches (the Aes Sedai) protect the world. Unlike wonderful Les Dawson and Bob Monkhouse, Jimmy didn’t write his own material, so it’s a shame the documentary producers snubbed his gag-writers. ANYONE else worried about the Frasier revival? Why mess with perfectio