I ended the affair because I couldn't deal with the secrecy and the unsure nature of anything with it. But I will always be grateful for that man." I was reading a news article about a kidnapping on my phone before bed. I had a thought that I didn’t want to keep the article open in my phone overnight. The other issue is my relationship with my husband. Why did this affair happen when I had never been unfaithful before? We do quarrel , but have sex once or twice a week. However, I’m not particularly attracted to him and go through the motions . (Although the affair has unexpectedly boosted our intimacy .) We were in love when we married, but after the children were born I felt I could have lived without sex . One weekend as I was heading over to meet up with him, I got a text that his girlfriend had found out and he had to cancel. It all stopped soon after that. I then left my job and cut all ties.

Confessions of an Office Worker - OverDrive

For Maisy*, 30, that emotional side of things was important – as well as having a shared common ground. Imagine you are in an office building and building management arrives and tells you there will be a fire alarm test, and to disregard the alarm. When the building alarm goes off, it is still very loud and ominous sounding. Because of the prior information you received, you decide to contextualize the alarm as a test and do nothing. This is synonymous to the alarm signal that your OCD sends off when having intrusive thoughts. You can contextualize the received information as an intrusive, OCD thought that doesn’t need a response. It will still be loud and may be obnoxious for a while, but the fact remains that it is a false alarm. Im working on using mindfulness for my thoughts ie: accepting the thoughts and not thinking they are good or bad , but just thoughts Long story short, we were both married and had an office affair for a year. We had decided to break up with our significant others so we could be together. I even bought him a car so he could make it to work on time. A little before my divorce became final, he brought my replacement to work with us."Hi Lisa, I’m happy to hear the article resonated with you. Remember, even if your OCD skips to a new topic, they are all just thoughts and are equal in value. Treat it as something that your OCD will do when it gets desperate for your attention. If you don’t respond to any new theme or tactic, you will be heading in the right direction. Love this post! On more than one occasion people with OCD have told me some of their thoughts and said, “Can you believe what a horrible person I must be if I have these thoughts?” My response has always been that I have the same or similar thoughts and I realize they mean nothing. Your post is not only extremely informative, it’s entertaining as well! We ended up dating and have been together for about two years now. He told me he was leaving his wife, and that that was a decision they made a long time ago but hasn’t gotten done because of his kids.

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Hey, Stacey. What if you have a fear of adopting new obsessions? So lets say you already have a fear of acting out sexually towards children so you start worrying about “what if I start becoming afraid of acting out sexually towards family members?” I greatly appreciate and can totally identify with the article that you have written ( thank you!). I have suffered with ROCD for about 6 years but have been fine for the past 3 years with just a week here or there where I feel very anxious over certain thoughts.Thanks for reading…I’m so glad you enjoyed it. It really does help to find humor in life’s challenges, especially when discovering ways to peacefully coexist alongside your OCD. Hey, Stacey. I’ve been suffering from HOCD(gay ocd) for the past 4 months and I’m happy to say that it has gotten tremendously better… however, it’s not quite gone. What are some exercises that I could do on my own for me to really put and end to this? Thank you. I believed him even though I knew maybe I shouldn’t. I don’t want to sound selfish, but all I want is for him to get that done, and I feel horrible for thinking that way." I have Pure O about being a pedofile and I think it is because its my worst fear. Some of my weird thoughts have been: I need a hint, if possible. My fear is mainly about HIV, probably because is a long term and potentially fatal illness. I try to explain, if someone tell me that if you share your glass you can catch SARS (example), i’m not scared because i know that in few days i’ll know if I catched it or not. But if i start to think that if I share glass I can get HIV (I know that’s impossible, it’s an example) my OCD start to fuel my thoughts because I know that I will know it only after many years, and, in the meantime, I can infect other people.

Confessions Of An Office Worker - Troubador Book Publishing

I had to work with them both for another three months, and their PDA was legendary at the theater. They dated for about a year before he found out she was cheating on him with three other guys, and he was so heartbroken he left the state." Be honest with yourself and stop pretending you want to see this other man for work reasons. I think your primary aim is to repeat that night, and I can understand why. An experience like that can be exciting and heady; but it’s not sustainable in the real world. Plus, you are married and he has made it obvious that he doesn’t want to see you. You need to listen to the silence from him.Lastly, forcing yourself to feel guilty may be a ritual as well. Since you are afraid of letting yourself off the hook from guilt for fear you may become a sociopath, forcing guilt to feel like a good human being is a compulsion. A compulsion is anything you are doing to prevent a feared outcome and feel less anxiety / uncertainty. As a colleague of mine wisely said, “Embrace your inner sociopath.” You don’t need to figure anything out, it is an OCD trap. If you are feeling suicidal, you will want to make sure you are under the care of a mental health professional. It would be good to get the assistance of an OCD specialist.