Good Inside: The new Sunday Times bestselling gentle parenting guide for fans of Philippa Perry

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There are unstated lines to "if you have a problem with anything your kids are doing, you need to work on yourself instead" and "whatever your behavior as a parent is, it's fine as long as you do better later." I got the sense she assumes we're all from the same culture/class/upbringing/etc and knows what isn't being said. I told my friend that the book is kind of a convergence between Den Siegel and Brené Brown’s work. A little bit of No Drama Discipline and Whole Brain Child mixed with a healthy dose of Daring Greatly and Gifts of Imperfection (I highly recommend all four of those, by the way). I think the best gift we can give our kids is helping them realize that happiness is not the goal. Of course, we want our children to experience happiness. But if we only focus on happiness, we don’t leave room for all of the other emotions that our kids are going to experience. If we focus on building resilience, we help our kids learn to regulate when they experience sadness, anger, and distress. Seeking fairness in a family dynamic actually leads to big problems. When you focus on equality, and not equity of need, you raise a bunch of bean counters that obsess about what their siblings have received. You set them up for disimpassioned entitlement. In summary, I think every parent should read this book. This review really only scratches the surface. Every time I opened the book to reference for this post, I’d find something else I wanted to include. I had to finally just cut myself off, lol!

Good Inside Summary of Key Ideas and Review - Blinkist Good Inside Summary of Key Ideas and Review - Blinkist

One of the ways you can do that is with deliberate one-on-one time without your cell phone. You don’t need to take a week off screens or shut off your internet. Just make it a point to have regular moments where your children see you put your phone away and focus on them. Next, you need to accept the fundamental truth that two things can be true at the same time. Even if the two things don’t necessarily get along with each other. For instance, your child wants ice cream for breakfast, and you don’t allow them to have ice cream for breakfast. When you allow both things to be true, you won’t feel the need to completely change your child’s feelings.Book Summary: The Connected Child by Karyn B. Purvis The Connected Child is a book that focuses on the importance of attachment and connection in the lives of children. Written by Karyn B. Purvis, the book provides parents, caregivers,… The rationale behind this is pseudoscientific babble. Kids cannot regulate their emotions well (fact). Therefore, you need to help them (okay). And if you don’t do it the right way, the kid will grow up emotionally unhealthy and be unable to have functional adult relationships (whaaaat…?!).

Good Inside by Dr Becky Kennedy | Waterstones

When we focus on what’s under the surface, when we give children what they need to be less combustible inside, their behavior will appear less explosive on the outside. By understanding what motivates behavior, we can help kids build resilience and regulate emotions, which will inevitably lead to behavioral changes.” Most generous interpretation If your child has no intrinsic motivation to complete something, you can either bully them (authoritarian parenting), or you can provide extrinsic motivation (authoritative parenting), or you let them skip it (permissive parenting). Robežas nenozīmē pateikt bērniem, ko viņi nedrīkst darīt; robežas nozīmē pateikt bērniem, ko mēs darīsim.Trying to see what the deal is with this very popular thing. I was curious about the book because when I'd heard Kennedy in an interview and in a bit of her podcast, I've found her suggested language to be passive-aggressive, guilt-trippy, and just phenomenally wordy. I actually thought the book was a lot better in this regard. Children should be treated with respect and not as adversaries. Their behaviors should get the most generous interpretation and least aggressive correction. Minimizing anxiety around food is sometimes more important than the consumption of that food. Give dessert alongside the meal to lower the states and take sweets down from the pedestal (I do this with my daughter and it works extremely well. She loves treats but doesn’t hyperfocus on them and has never thrown a tantrum when I’ve said no to a treat). Proverbs 17:25 "A foolish son brings grief to his father and bitterness to the mother who bore him."

Good Inside Book Review | Dr. Becky Kennedy - Ruth Nuss Good Inside Book Review | Dr. Becky Kennedy - Ruth Nuss

This book does have some great content. I don’t hate all of it. And there are plenty of other parenting methods (RIE, modern Montessori, Love and Logic) that have super-weird aspects to them, some of which are counterproductive. When you read a parenting book, you are reading someone’s deeply biased opinions, and you need to bring your brain and a shaker of salt.Happiness is less compelling than resilience. After all, cultivating happiness is dependent on regulating distress. That’s the big paradox: the more able we are to regulate hard feelings, the more space there is in our bodies to generate happiness. So how can we help our kids build regulation skills early on for the best chance of cultivating happiness later on? Connection-building is ongoing and it creates the best environment for kids to bring their inside good to the outside, but it doesn’t do away with unwanted behaviors. In the next section, let’s talk first about bad behaviors, and then about normal behaviors that look bad. When Disconnection Occurs Gentle Parenting is not completely new. "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen" was published in 1999 and suggests treating kids with respect and consideration. (I think it's a great book -- highly recommend). "Kids, Parents, Power Struggles" by Kurcinka was published in 2001. However, the primary thrust of Kurcinka was to develop a close relationship with your child, NOT that you are responsible for managing their emotions.