I resonate with this post so much! I’ve always had body image issues and have used food to cope with stress. I think it’s awesome that you were able to not sexualize a shower experience you had with a dude you found attractive! I struggle so much with fear that I might have a physiological response especially if I did find the dude attractive. I envy the freedom you’ve experienced through this!

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I still look in the mirror sometimes and wish I were a healthier weight. But I don’t hate my body like I once did. Elevate your well-being with our medical team. Our comprehensive healthcare approach adds a new dimension to your fitness journey.For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known. It’s so freeing to realize that we’re so much more than our sexuality. It’s just another beautiful part of what makes us us as children of God. I absolutely loved your final line that spoke to that. God is with us and He is the way. Keep up all the great work, Ben! Thanks for this post! Recently, I was shirtless with one of my best friends. He’s a Christian brother and wonderfully masculine. I was concerned at first because I doubted my motives, but in the moment, I was like “I can’t possibly lust after him! I love him in Christ way too much!” That, I think, showed me that I can love with a love stronger than lust. It gave me an opportunity to live as a man and not as a greedy broken boy. In conversations here in the US, when I share the above experiences with Americans, I notice an immediate assumption that Europeans have somehow evolved further than Americans. Almost without fail the listener chimes in, “See? Why are we such prudes (or why are we so violent) in the US? They are fine with nudity over there and they don’t have issues with rape or assault…” There is an assumption that because they are more permissive or inclusive or whatever, they are better off. But I can tell you that is not true. Based on our observations and conversations with many friends, it is evident that the vast majority of kids are sexually active by the time they’re 15. Many girls’ partners are well into their 20s (we heard of a handful in their 30s) and this isn’t questioned or cause for concern. Based on statistics we know that over half of all pregnancies are aborted. We saw firsthand that women’s bodies are objectified and commodified. Their cavalier attitude about nudity and sex and gender is not without consequence.

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Larger changing rooms are usually found at public beaches, or other bathing areas, where most of the space is for changing, and minimal washroom space is included. Beach-style changing rooms are often large open rooms with benches against the walls. Some do not have a roof, providing just the barrier necessary to prevent people outside from seeing in. Living in the undergrad dorms at a conservative Christian college helped me see other guys less mysteriously, as some of them were more casual in their nudity. But I was still leery of the showers in the student athletic center. They were completely public — no stalls — with multiple shower heads sprouting from the walls.

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After I came out to my closer friends and began to process my sexuality, I saw distinctions between just being “one of the guys” and attraction related to my queerness. Not every guy was an “attraction-trigger,” after all. I knew this in my head but was uncertain how this might play out in reality. Our discrete setting ensures you can focus on your well-being without interruptions or waiting long periods to use equipment.

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That moment was healing in so many ways. It took away the mystery from what one of my closest friends looked like, showing me I could keep my brother as my brother. He knew of my same-sex attraction, but he treated me like any other guy. He made me feel safe with him because he didn’t put me in a special attraction-based box. I appreciate the Philippians reference. While some healing and good happen in this life, I also am reminded that we only get pieces of that now. We are in the Kingdom of God now. But it’s now, and also “not yet.” The full consummation of what will be in Christ is yet to come.