If the boy experiences sexual arousal or pleasure during the abuse, he enjoyed it, and it was not abuse, because he participated. Incest (sexual relationships between family members) is taboo and can bring a strong sense of guilt and shame to its victims (Kluft, 2011). While the idea that fathers sexually abuse their children is disturbing, it is accepted as something that can (and does) happen. It is well documented and studied.

Stories About Mother-Son Relationships - Electric Literature Stories About Mother-Son Relationships - Electric Literature

Because this is awfully close. Especially the hand-boob action. (Benefit of doubt: Maybe it was an accident?) [ Image via INF] Jay, I have some words to share. Please [Jay and everybody} take them in the friendly concerned manner in which they are intended. Try to see things through the eyes of your son and his spouse. While you may not know where you fit into your son's new life, he may feel the same way. Open communication can clarify your role as a mother-in-law and help both of you find a way forward that everyone is happy with.Reporting incest and seeking professional help may be both shameful and difficult in any situation, but it can be even more difficult in the case of a mother. Often, the reaction will be complete rejection or disbelief. Unfortunately, the perception of a male monopoly on perpetrating incest has led to the creation of damaging myths that silence the male victim. Males and Sexual Abuse: The Myths Friedersdorf, C. (2016, November 28). The understudied female sexual predator. The Atlantic. Retrieved from https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2016/11/the-understudied-female-sexual-predator/503492 Due to the refusal of boys and men to seek help or press charges against mothers who abuse them, it is nearly impossible to determine the prevalence of sexual abuse committed by mothers. However, a few studies offer surprising results and indicate the problem is more widespread than most people would assume. At least they look like they're having fun. I feel kind of bad intruding on their family beach play day; Stephanie's entire family, including her husband, were present, and none of them seem weirded out. (Note that he retracted his fingers in this picture.) But seriously, is this normal behavior? How close is too close between mother and son? [ Image via INF, tip via james_from_cambridge]

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Kelly, R. J., Wood, J. J., Gonzalez, L. S., MacDonald, V., & Waterman, J. (2002). Effects of mother-son incest and positive perceptions of sexual abuse experiences on the psychosocial adjustment of clinic-referred men. Child Abuse & Neglect, 26(4), 425-441. Retrieved from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12092807 For example, one study that conducted in-depth interviews of seven men and seven women who reported sexual abuse by a female perpetrator, most of whom experienced severe sexual abuse by their mothers, found a range of long-term damaging effects. Victims reported and/or experienced depression, difficulties with substance abuse, self-injury, increased suicide rate, rage, strained relationships with women, identity issues, and discomfort with sex (Denov, 2004). Researcher Lucetta Thomas has identified persistent and damaging myths in regard to male sexual victimization. These myths not only exist in the minds of boys and men who themselves are victims—they are also prevalent in the attitudes and perception of social workers, law enforcement, and even psychologists or counselors (Friedersdorf, 2016). Myths around males and sexual abuse include the following: When we examine outcomes of victims of any type of incest, we find this type of abuse is related to issues around relational trauma and betrayal trauma. Abuse by a trusted family member leads to a significant loss of trust and changes in beliefs around the self and safety in relationships (Kluft, 2011). Understandably, when the perpetrator is a mother, the trauma is likely to carry a particularly high level of damage, especially in light of the cultural perceptions of mothers as nurturers. Furthermore, the implications of reporting abuse of this nature can be catastrophic for the victim, the mother, and the entire family. In many cases, this leaves the victim feeling as if he has no choice but to deal with the trauma in silence. What Professionals Need to Know Holmes, G. R., Offen, L., & Waller, G. (1997). See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil: Why do relatively few male victims of childhood sexual abuse receive help for abuse-related issues in adulthood?. Clinical Psychology Review, 17(1), 69-88. Retrieved from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9125368That night was the beginning of our relationship, it was emotional first; but, it progressed into sexual shortly after. Although the idea that some fathers can be sexual predators towards their own family is accepted, the parallel idea, that mothers can be sexual predators towards their own children, has not been widely accepted. We live in a culture that tends to idolize motherhood. Mothers sacrifice so much to give us everything we need. In our society, speaking against a mother is almost sacrilegious. Unfortunately, the perception of a male monopoly on perpetrating incest has led to the creation of damaging myths that silence the male victim. If he is comfortable dressing in a way that makes him feel like he blends in, I think that is great. However, I want him to have the inner confidence to step out of the box if he wants. If he feels like wearing something, even though none of his peers are, I want him to feel like he can. Professionals, particularly those working with sexual abuse cases, need to examine their own perceptions around women as potential abusers. It must be understood that this type of abuse is possible, does happen, and can do extraordinary damage to its victims. In general, many people have been under the impression that a woman cannot really harm another person sexually. This is not the case. As new research surfaces, we are finding that sexual abuse from mother to son can bring lasting trauma and long-term mental health effects (Denov, 2004).